Throughout my sophomore and junior years, I spent many nights eating dinner alone. By that I mean, I would walk to a nearby restaurant or take the Light Rail to a new spot in town and eat a meal by myself. Sometimes I’d bring a book or just the essentials of a wallet, keys, phone, and AirPods and maybe treat a video essay as my dinner companion. Other times, I’d sit in silence, listening to the bustle and conversations of those around me, enjoying my time with the actual best dinner companion: myself. I like to say I’m good company.
I would drop that into conversations casually because that’s all it was–and still is–to me. It’s casual. It’s just eating dinner, and I happen to be alone. Not a big deal, right?
For some, it is.
I will say, I get met with more “that’s so cool” than “that’s so weird.” Some have even asked, “How do you do it? I could never.” It wasn’t something I woke up one day completely fine with doing, I felt that initial anxiety of “these people are judging me, they all think I’m waiting for someone who will never show, etc.” But, I tried my best to silence those voices. What’s weirder? Eating dinner by yourself at that one restaurant you’ve been dying to try, or judging someone for eating alone? The latter is so juvenile, so high school.Â
Grabbing dinner on my own gives me a chance to run through my day, and think about my favorite movies or TV shows, or people-watch without worrying about keeping a conversation going. Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends and the time we spend together, but–as an introvert–my alone time is a sacred thing. And alone time doesn’t have to be watching a YouTube video or three in bed, it can be anywhere. That’s the wonderful thing about alone time. As long as you’re alone, it can be anywhere, and you can do anything!
But there’s something about eating on your own that’s seen as a daring thing when, really, it’s a skill to be honed. Like anything, you have to put time and effort into it. By that I mean, replace the desire to place an order for pick up or take out with one to dine in. One word makes all the difference. It doesn’t have to be major, I haven’t reached the point where I could go to a Michelin Star restaurant on my own (mainly because they’re too expensive for the too-small portions…), so start small. Fast food or fast casual makes for a great first solo-dinner outing. Don’t get hung up one who might be looking, instead, think about the food, think about that one paper you have to write, debate the popular theories for the next episodes of The White Lotus. These are all things we do on the regular, right? Just, next time, do it while dining alone!