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Charlotte Reader / Her Campus
SBU | Life > Experiences

One Step Ahead, Yet so Far Behind

Adria Hoadley Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

I’ve always been the type to pick out my outfit the night before. I set my alarm for 7 a.m. when I don’t have class until 10 a.m. If an assignment is due on Friday I have it done by Monday night. I do my laundry before the basket is full. I always leave my house 10 minutes early. I use a planner to methodically write out everything I must do for weeks in advance. I text my friends every morning to see what time they want to have dinner, so I have time to get everything done by then. 

I have never been the type of person to casually stroll into class five minutes late. If I don’t start studying a week in advance, I convince myself that I’ll fail. I rarely make last minute plans because I automatically assume that if I go off schedule my day will be ruined. The point is; I always plan ahead, but I fear that if I don’t, I will fall behind. 

Now that I’m almost 20, I realize that I’ve spent so much time planning ahead that I’ve missed time in the moment. I convinced myself that planning ahead allows me to “live in the moment,” but in reality, it’s done the exact opposite. How could I ever live in the moment if I spend every waking moment thinking about the next? 

I used to think I was just wired that way, that my anxiety wouldn’t allow me to enjoy my day-to-day life because I’m too busy worrying about the next thing on my mental to do list. It’s taken me so long to realize that my anxiety about the future has caused me to fall behind. To make meaningful friendships, memories, and an impact on the world, sometimes I need to let go of my idealized image of the future and enjoy what’s then and now.  

Naturally, I catch my mind wandering and often end up worrying about next week’s exam, or my drive home for break, but then I bring myself back to the moment and focus on what’s in front of me. There’s something to be said about truly enjoying the beauty of a simple moment. My life has changed drastically since I’ve allowed myself to stop obsessing over the unknown and grasp onto what I have right in front of me. The biggest lesson that I’ve learned over the past year is to stop letting the future define the present.  

Adria Hoadley

SBU '26

Adria Hoadley is a senior at St. Bonaventure University from Union Springs, New York, and this is her fourth semester writing for Her Campus. Writing has always been her creative outlet, and she loves sharing her voice.

As a psychology major, Adria is passionate about mental health and often uses that topic to motivate her articles. After graduating with her undergraduate degree from SBU in the spring, she hopes to go on and get her master’s degree in school counseling. Apart from Her Campus, Adria is involved with several other clubs on campus and enjoys volunteering in her free time.

Outside of school, Adria enjoys spending time with friends, getting coffee, listening to music, and online shopping. Although she loves a fun night out, she can usually be found staying in and binge-watching Grey's Anatomy while brainstorming ideas for Her Campus articles.