For years, the ingrained beliefs of this patriarchal world led me to think that female friendships are “dramatic” and are based on “hatred” or “gossip”. I let them trick me into believing that I could never truly find real female friends.
One thing about me is that I’m a rebel at heart, and I love proving the world wrong—so that is exactly what I did. In the 19 years of my ever-changing life, I have come across women who were the best friends one could ask for.
Sure, I faced my fair share of betrayals and friendship breakups but they were never really because of what gender they were rather it was more about the type of human they were.
I can never really complain about any of my “ex” friendships because each one of them planted a tiny flower of a lesson in the garden of my heart.
When I entered college, I was a highly anxious, introverted soul who had made it her mission to break out of her shell and put herself out into the world. I remember entering my hostel and praying to only get good friends out of that place.
That is when I met my “neighbours” who are now some of the most important women to me. I still can’t quite comprehend exactly how we five became friends but I am eternally grateful that we did. These free souls accepted me in ways that I could never accept myself. My college journey began, and with it came crazy 2 a.m. DJ nights—dancing our hearts out to Bollywood songs, playing hide-and-seek, laughing like little kids, eating Maggi from kettles, late-night pizzas, shopping hauls, and personal fashion shows before going out. As much as I cherished the happy-jolly parts of this experience, I also loved the way I could just sit and tell them whatever I wanted without ever being judged. I never had to hold back my personality with them and never felt that I had to “fit in”. I could vent my heart out to these girls for one minute and laugh about some stupid joke in the second one.
Even though we didn’t go out much because, at the end of the day, we were just 5 broke college girls who were trying to manage their food expenses on their monthly allowance—we made countless memories that I will forever lock in my heart and will cherish forever.
These women taught me that true friendship is never conditional. It could be my worst wound and they would be there for me running to help me get through it. Each one of them holds a special place in my heart. We do get on each other’s nerves but at the end of the day, I’d choose no one else to run to when my social battery runs low because that is how special they are to me.
I will never forget feeling lost and sad, staring at the stars from my hostel balcony at 2 a.m., when my best friend walked in and listened to me vent for over an hour. Our pasts were so similar that we would joke we were meant to meet. She’s the girl that I’d run to over and over again when the world hurts me because I know she’d calmly sit and hold my heart for hours until the colours return to my face.
I could be extremely silly with her and never have a fear of being judged, we could listen to each other for hours and never get tired of the same old.
These women taught me to be carefree of the judgments of the world and made my college life way better than I could’ve ever imagined it to be. Going to malls and doing silly tricks in stores- to calling out to each other after trying a new pretty dress in a store just to get their reactions and advice, they have my heart and back forever.
They make me realize that life is not about the ones who make you feel like a broken vinyl record but the ones who make you feel eternally dancing to “Dancing Queen” by ABBA. I could knock on their door like a maniac in the middle of the night and they’d always come running to help me. No matter where our lives take us after these college years, one thing I can be sure of is that I will always hold nothing but love for them.
Watching them make their way in the world makes me so proud of them, they are powerful, strong and filled with love and light of the world.
“Birds of a feather, we should stick together, I know
I said I’d never think I wasn’t better alone”
-Billie Eilish, Birds of a Feather, Hit me Hard and Soft
An honorary mention goes to my mother—my only friend who has stayed by my side for so long. She is one of the sweetest souls and the best friend one could have. Her warmth and light guide me to the good every day. I can cry, annoy, and laugh with her for hours while she makes hours feel like minutes. From fashion advice to frustrated rants she’s my speed dial contact for any situation. She calls me her “bestie” and never fails to make me feel like one. She’s the only answer and solution to all my problems. As clichè it may sound, my mom is my best friend.
I’m eternally grateful for all the women in my life and for the love and light, they spread out in the world.
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