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Illinois | Wellness > Mental Health

Self-Love for Valentine’s Day

Autumn Bunzell Student Contributor, University of Illinois - Urbana-Champaign
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Illinois chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Valentine’s Day. When we think about this holiday, we may imagine bundles of red roses, boxes of chocolates, and romantic evenings. If you are someone who isn’t in a romantic relationship right now, then you may envision yourself participating in Galentine’s Day with a few of your closest friends. Or you may absolutely dread this day altogether. It may bring you a sense of feeling left out, or, perhaps, downright disgust. 

With or without someone to spend time with this Valentine’s Day, we need to accommodate time for showing ourselves some love too. While self-love and appreciation is important all year round, I find it even more so during this time. Without love for ourselves, how are we supposed to show those dearest to us that we love and appreciate them? How are we supposed to fall in love with life if we don’t love ourselves first?

If you struggle with finding contentment within yourself, then please read this article. Once upon a time, I was deeply unsatisfied with a lot of aspects about myself. I rarely felt like I was enough, and no individual should ever have to feel that way. You are always enough.

This Valentine’s Day is for you, my dear. You are going to spoil yourself and appreciate everything that you have done. Don’t minimize the miles you’ve gone, and don’t you dare compare yourself to someone else. This is about healing your relationship with yourself.

Celebrate the Little Things

Yes, I’m going to be this cliche, but it’s so true. It’s imperative you start appreciating all of the small things in life and the things you do for yourself. Perhaps, you only appreciate yourself when you pass a milestone or when you do something major. I’m not saying this is not needed because it totally is. I’m saying that you need to celebrate the day-to-day things too. For instance, you’re going to celebrate when you graduate college, but you need to appreciate all of those times where you showed up for yourself. The times where you could barely get out of bed and went to class anyways. The times where you studied and studied. The times where you got beat down (figuratively) and got back up anyways. The times where you went out of your comfort zone a little. The bottom line is that you need to appreciate yourself throughout the journey as much as when you reach your destination.

Practice Positive Self-Talk

If you don’t say mean things to your best friend, then why are you saying them to yourself? Talk to yourself like you’re talking to a younger version of yourself. Lift them up. Don’t tear them down. 

When you say something mean to yourself, say “I take that back.” If you struggle with loving your body, then don’t tear yourself to pieces standing in front of a mirror. Recognize how strong your body is. That’s the same body that allows you to do your favorite things. That’s the same body that hugs your parents when you come home from college. 

A young transgender woman looking at her reflection in a bathroom mirror?width=1024&height=1024&fit=cover&auto=webp&dpr=4
Zackary Drucker / VICE Gender Spectrum Collection

While there’s more aspects to self-love that this article doesn’t talk about, try positive self-talk and celebrating the little things. I promise you that these two are the introductory methods for really finding contentment and love for yourself.

Autumn Bunzell

Illinois '27

Hi there! My name is Autumn Rose, and I'm from Utica, Illinois. I live minutes away from Starved Rock State Park. I attended LaSalle-Peru Township High School which consists of only about 1,200 students. Within my family, I'm the youngest in a close-knit household, and I have an older sister who I absolutely adore. As well, I have a golden retriever and a grey tabby cat.

Currently, I'm a first-year neuroscience student at the University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign. Both the physical and psychological aspects of the human brain fascinate me. In addition, I'm interested in nutrition and how this field can be applied to neuroscience. There is a field labeled nutritional neuroscience that studies how the consumption of food, minerals, and supplements impacts an individual's cognition, mood, and overall brain health.

Outside of the classroom, my hobbies vary tremendously. Music wise, I listen to Bryce Vine and Bazzi, but I also love Etta Mae, Arethra Franklin, and Frank Sinatra. As I do my morning routine, I listen to health and wellness podcasts on Spotify. In between classes, I do yoga and Pilates. At night, I love to do some skincare, and then crawl into bed with one of my books. Typically, I partake in crocheting and baking in the colder months. As a side note, my favorite season is fall because of the cool weather and all of the pumpkin/apple candles, foods, coffees, etc.