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Living in Two Worlds: Growing Up as the Child of Refugees in America 

Emily You Student Contributor, University of Massachusetts - Boston
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Mass Boston chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

I am an imposter; the child of refugees.

My name isn’t Emily, it’s Vanny, which means butterflies. 

My pa told me that it was his idea thanks to a dream he had of a small girl who came to visit him days before finding out he was having a second child, and then months later finding out I was a girl because it took my parents nearly a decade of miscarriages to have my little brother and I. 

I was considered a powerful beacon of guidance through difficult times for my parents, but despite being considered a “beacon of guidance,” I am called Emily by my friends, classmates, teachers, etc, but at home I am still called Vanny. 

My pa adored my name and stated that I will always be his Vanny, but my mother began to realize Vanny wasn’t a good name to have me go by outside of the house. Because to her, and like other Asian families, having a name that was nowhere near close to English meant I wouldn’t be granted opportunities that she couldn’t achieve; I would be placed in English as Second Language classes, I’d be discriminated against based on my name.  

And yet, despite being born and raised in America with an “American” name, my mother couldn’t shield me away from everything a mother wants to shield their child from. I was faced with linguistic discrimination. I was placed in ESL classes, and I was discouraged and forbidden from speaking my native language.

Unlike other Asians who chose to move to the United States in pursuit of economic success, my family and many Khmer refugees had no choice but to escape their homeland and seek refuge in camps like those in Thailand to evade the horrors of war, executions, and labor camps imposed by the Khmer Rouge. Survivors of the Khmer Rouge Era, including my family and other Khmer families, vividly recount the horrifying experiences. My mom, in particular, shares stories of how she and her family managed to escape Khmer Rouge soldiers, fleeing to Thailand after enduring imprisonment in labor camp(s).

When my mother first landed in America, she was in Alaska for a few days before her family and her began to travel around the United States to try to get on with their lives, but it was hard too. They had to deal with a baggage of emotions and dealing with adjusting to a new life, and throughout the process she had to experience various stresses. Unfamiliarity within the American system and linguistic and cultural barriers made it difficult to find employment and participate in the classroom. 

I’ve realized that despite my mother going through these circumstances, history happens to repeat itself as my brothers and I happen to go through similar experiences as she did. Same complexities, different generations. As time passed, I realized I will always be known as two different people: Vanny or Emily.

Emily You

U Mass Boston '26

Emily is an editor at Her Campus at the UMASS Boston Chapter. Beyond Her Campus, she is a first-generation student-athlete majoring in Nursing. Emily is currently training within the Boston University Army ROTC program with hopes to become a Physician Assistant and commission as a Second Lieutenant after graduation. She is also a member of the U.S. Army Massachusetts National Guard.

In addition, she is involved in various student activities at UMASS Boston, including being a member of the Khmer Cultural Association Club, Powerlifting Club, and Chess Club. She works as a fitness attendant at the UMB Recreation Center and is part of the UMASS Boston Cheer Team.

Emily is currently taking a gap year from the fall semester of 2024 to the spring semester of 2025 to serve in the U.S. Army but plans to return to school once she’s done. In her free time, Emily enjoys catching up on rest after her long weeks and going into the city to hang out with her friends.