The year is 2015. My friends are trying to learn the precocious āJingle Bell RockāĀ Mean GirlsĀ dance. My Spanish teacher is attempting to teach us to sing āAll I Want for Christmas is Youā in Spanish. The student council is decking the halls of our school with wreaths and garlands. And I, freshly twelve years old, walk through the halls of my middle school hoping nobody will ask me what I want for Christmas. Because the answer, ānothingā doesnāt really make sense, and the answer āmy family doesnāt reallyĀ doĀ Christmas (and no, weāre not Jewish either)ā kind of brings down the mood.
I always felt a little uncomfortable around Christmas, growing up. My family just doesnāt celebrate anything. And scrolling through Instagram and seeing friendsā piles of Christmas gifts was always a little disheartening. My dad always said, āif you really need something, just ask for it and we can get itā. Which is nice in theory, but something about the idea of a present ā the surprise, the thoughtfulness, the indulgence of it ā was all little middle school me wanted around Christmas time.
And then, towards the end of high school, things shifted. Donāt get me wrong; I still love a good gift. My birthday is my favorite day of the year. But Iāve stopped comparing my holiday traditions with other people. I go skating. I make hot chocolate. I donāt need a Christmas tree or a pile of presents to enjoy my winter break. I donāt feel pressure to spend time with extended family, or to buy a bunch of things for everyone I know. I donāt have anything against a big Christmas, but Iāve never had it and I donāt feel I need it anymore.
I donāt think we should assume anyone spends their holidays in any certain way. And we should definitely quit asking people what they got for Christmas! Everyone has their own traditions, so you canāt really get Christmas wrong. I donāt need Christmas gifts; I prefer giving and receiving gifts spontaneously. And I donāt need a big old tree, but do I like some lights strung up outside. Itās all about personal preference!
I know it might seem really Grinchy of me to bash Christmas. Like Iām āmissing out on the magical spirit of the holidayā or something. But a large part of the holiday is nostalgia, and so perhaps if Iād grown up with Christmas, I would feel more inclined to carry out the tradition. I think I was raised as more of a Halloween girl, or even a Valentineās Day fiend. Christmas and I just donāt vibe; the consumerism and the pressure just doesnāt seem like something I feel the need to participate in.
I have no idea whether, when Iām older, Iāll want to celebrate Christmas with my hypothetical kids. But as for right now, Iām perfectly happy without it. If only I could time-travel back to 2015 and tell my little twelve-year-old self to quit comparing her winter break to everyone elseās. This break is really just time for yourself and your loved ones, and whether you want to call that Christmas is entirely up to you!