Navigating genuine female relationships as an adult is extremely challenging. Everyone is trying to balance life so how do we make time for fun with our girlfriends? I have asked myself this question quite a few times. The most important question is how do we actually be there for each other as women?
#1: Communication. We tend to get lost in the sauce of our lives and neglect the people that we love most. Our friends. It is okay to reach out and tell your friends, “I am not mentally available right now.” Jobs, school, and family issues consume us the most which drains us of our energy. Tell your friends that you need a break!
#2: Understanding. We expect other people to be understanding of us but when the shoe is on the other foot we are not as receptive. We all know our friends inside and out. If you see that they are not acting like themselves or are quiet, reach out. A little bit of compassion goes a long way.
#3: Schedule girl time. Shows such as Girlfriends have depicted that we as women are busy but should always make time for our friends. The women in the show would grab something to eat or go out for drinks. Try getting all of your girlfriends on one accord and figure out each other’s schedules. You will realize that having girl time is a much needed stress reliever after a long week of school, work, and going through the tribulations of life.
#4: Relationships vs. Friends. Don’t always put your relationship before your friends. Your friends were always there for you when you needed them. Try to find that balance between your relationship and your friends. Don’t always bring Mr. Boyfriend around when it is time for you to hang out with the girls. Let that time be sacred. Also, keep your relationship business between you and your significant other if you feel like you are going to stay with that person regardless of the advice that your friends provide. Your friends want the best for you and if you run to them at every minor inconvenience, they will begin to resent your relationship. You’re probably wondering, “But if they are my friends they should respect my relationship.” True. Yet, your friends hate seeing you get hurt over and over again. As a friend, it hurts me when my friends come to me crying just to go back and accept the person back into their life. On the other hand, also respect your friends’ decisions and support them! Balance.
Knowing how to be a good girlfriend and supporter are essential skills that all women should possess. If you don’t know how to be a good friend then you will not be able to experience and bear the fruits of great long lasting relationships. Be there for one another and respect each other. I hope you find your tribe as it is never too late!