My sexuality is not something that I realized easily. Growing up, I was trained to like boys, as many young girls are. It was something that was ingrained into me unintentionally with comments like, “I bet all the boys are lined up at your door,” and “One day when you get a boyfriend…” The idea that it was possible for me to like females was not one that I was exposed to or knew about until I was in sixth grade.
Throughout middle school, I recognized that I was attracted to other girls. However, since this was not what I was “supposed” to feel, I pushed the feelings away and didn’t give them much thought. I liked boys too, though. Since I was taught that one was either gay or straight, liking boys meant that I was straight, right? It was only in high school, when this attraction to other females became undeniable, that I started to really pay attention to and try to understand it. It was confusing and difficult to wrap my mind around, because, while I recognized that I like girls, it was still obvious that I like boys too. Seeing how things had been presented to me as either black or white, gay or straight, finding my sexuality was not simple or easy.
I cannot speak for any others that identify as bisexual, but, based on my own experiences, I feel that it is safe to assume that this sexuality is not one that is easy to navigate for a large number of people. Bisexuality is still seen by many (even some in the LGBTQ community) as “not real” and those who identify as bisexual are thought of as “confused” or needing to “pick a side.” This, however, is not the reality of the situation.
The reality is that bisexuality is very real, very normal, and very okay. In a survey done by Pew Research Center in 2013, it was found that about 40% of the LGBTQ population in America identifies as bisexual. So it is shocking to me that even though close to half of the LGBTQ community is bisexual, some people still believe that this identity is not real. It is real. I cannot say this enough.
Bisexuality, and all other identities that fall under the bisexual umbrella, are real and valid. It is possible to be attracted to multiple genders. This is a fact that everyone needs to accept. I, and many other individuals who identify as bisexual, have been put in the uncomfortable position of having to defend this fact when faced with phrases like, “But your last relationship was a straight one, so you are straight.” No, just because one is in or has been in a “straight” relationship does not make them any less bisexual. The reverse is also true. Just because one is in or has been in a “gay” relationship does not make them any less bisexual.
We as a society have come a long way, but we still have a long way to go. Things like Pride Week and Pride Parades are a step in the right direction and promote positivity and acceptance of LGBTQ individuals. So, we will keep having our parades. We will keep promoting acceptance. We will keep talking and talking even though people will tell us to stop, because it is only through continuous discussion of any issue that changes can start to happen.
The University of Utah’s Pride Week is October 3-7, 2016 and the Utah Pride Parade is on June 5, 2017. The University of Utah’s LGBTQ Resource Center is located in room 409 of the Student Union building. I highly recommend stopping by.