Let’s face it; college is the time where you meet so many different people. You finally got out of your stuffy home town where you were so tired of seeing the same faces from elementary school, right? That was defiantly how I was.
When everyone is living in close quarters, romance is bound to strike. you just have to make sure its the romance you want, and DESERVE.
There is nothing worse than liking a boy and never saying anything about it and pretending everything is okay, on the other hand it is not fun to force a relationship from a friendship and end up feeling like it is going nowhere and you are wasting your time and emotions.
I am sure we have all been in these situations (I know I have) so what takes these “flings” and chance encounters to the next level?
The next level may simply deciding to cut a relationship off, deciding to build a relationship, or something much larger.
Here are some helpful hints:
Be aware of your image- no one wants to have a long term relationship with the crazy girl at the party, as I once heard at a Woman workshop during my Graduate Assistant work with the Multicultural Center at Rider, “Keep the lady at the party” and I can’t think of a better way to phrase that.
Set your standards (& keep them!)- by knowing what you want and expect from your self and others make building a relationship (if that is ultimately what you want) a lot easier.
Now, let me share with you my story of how I caught (and kept!) the ultimate guy in college, Charlie (who is now my fiancé).
All started in Bio 115 “Biology of Animals” our Sophomore year at Rider University.
He sat in the front row, I sat in the back. He was adorable. I instantly had a high school crush. I proceeded to stalk his life.
Our teacher sent out a list of everyone going on this trip- I had no intention of going- his name was on the list– I decided to go– got their early saved a seat next to me on the bus & what happened… he didn’t show. But I kept going…
I also had Lab with Charlie and prayed every week that we would be put in the same group. Never happened. But it was in that lab class that we spoke for the first time.
Me- “I like your hair cut”
Him- “Thanks” (smile)
He then proceeded to stare at me the whole class. Creepy, but he is a cutie.
Next was the “moment of truth”: Our teacher asked for volunteers to demonstrate something in front of the class. Me being the smart ass that I am raised my hand and got selected. I apparently needed a partner. The teacher picked Mr. I Sit In The Front Row, Charlie.
I turned bright red & my friends are laughing hysterically in the back of the room knowing I had a crush on him.
What did we have to demonstrate, you ask?
Yes, frog sex. I had to lay my eggs and he had to fertilize them. Terrifying experience.
Well after we already “mated”, I got his number from another girl in the class and proceeded to text him– figuring that having frog sex was enough of an ice breaker.
We started dating shortly after and it has been about 4 years, engaged for about a year and a half, and getting married in 2013.
Moral of my story: Yes I am an upfront, open person (some may say stalker-ish), but I knew what I wanted and look how it all turned out!
Did I date total jerks in college and make stupid decisions before finding “the one”? Of course! College is for growing up and finding out who you are and who you want to be after graduation and in the “real world”. Set your standards ladies– and stick to them!
Make the men work for it and then you can build something together, if you feel it is worth it.
Now I am not saying everyone should be hunting for a husband in college.
Something that recently stood out to me was a quote in this summer’s hit movie “The Help”. Where Skeeter’s love interest is a complete (for lack of a better word) ass on their first date. He states something like, “Isn’t that what all you ladies major in up at Old Miss, professional husband hunting”.
I am just saying keep your eyes peeled, because you never know who could be sitting in the front row J.
Is marriage something the modern day “collegiate woman” is looking for or is it outdated? What do you guys think?