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Long-Distance Relationships…Worth the Struggle? Maybe.

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at PS Berks chapter.

As another school year begins, some leave home not only to leave their families behind, but a significant other as well. Some of these relationships began as summer romances; others have been relationships from high school. If you’re reading this and saying to yourself, “yeah, that’s totally me,” then keep reading. Or, just keep reading because you’re interested. As a sophomore college student attending Penn State Berks for my second year, I’ve known the struggles and triumphs of being in a long-distance relationship. For some long-distance relationships, it could simply be thirty minutes apart or possibly an entire country apart. Luckily for me, that distance is only two and half-hours away.

You’re probably wondering why you should listen to me. Well ladies, I’ve been working on this long term relationship for the past three years and it wasn’t always easy. Many relationships struggle with this question daily: “Is this distance worth the relationship?” No matter what the distance is, everyone struggles with making his or her relationships work. Especially, when it comes to being in different environments than your significant other. With being in different environments, there are all different types of people and factors, which are going to contribute to making your relationship work. One of the hardest things I’ve struggled with in my long-distance relationship is jealously. The first year was difficult since my boyfriend continued to hang out with a girl from his high school at his new college environment. I understand it’s hard to the first year when you don’t know too many people, but when the texts and calls are fewer each day, then it’s time to question it. Luckily for me, the texting and calling continued. Jealousy can be a factor that truly ends a relationship in my book, but in order to overcome this, trust is a must! If you really believe in your relationship, you have to trust the person. If there’s no trust, then I wouldn’t suggest a long-distance relationship.

Often times, both my boyfriend and I have questioned our relationship and the distance, but at the end of the day I know that I’m secure because I couldn’t imagine falling in love with someone else. I’m not a person to get all sappy, but its true. I’m thankful for having a long-distance relationship for a few reasons. One reason is that we can cherish the moments we do get together. For instance, this past weekend I hadn’t seen my boyfriend for nearly two and half weeks and I really needed to see him. When I drove the two and half hours to see him, I had butterflies like I had when we first started dating. Those moments are the moments I truly appreciate, because it really reminds me that this boy takes my breath away and has the ability to make everything right for once. Those moments make the distance bearable. The ‘good morning’ texts and “I love you” texts truly remind me that there is someone in the world who completes me. It’s not all about seeing the person everyday; it’s about the journey that brings you together forever.

As I have told my friends, even though I’ve been dating my boyfriend for three years, I don’t depend on him to make my life perfect or happy. The only person who can make everything right in your life is yourself. The hardest things in life may be seen sharing with a person, but there’s times where you’re going to have to figure things out on your own. Sure, it’s going to make you crazy, but wouldn’t you rather consider yourself a strong, independent woman? I haven’t always been that strong, independent women, but in my opinion you’re the only one who is going to make everything alright in the end. You can make everything okay by reading a novel you’ve always wanted to read, taking out your stress and problems out at the gym (my personal favorite), going out with your best girlfriends (another favorite), or simply having a good cry in bed. The important thing is, WHATEVER MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER. I would suggest putting all that energy in your schoolwork; it works for me. Sometimes, I call schoolwork my other significant other.

If your relationship is truly meant to be, it will be. If it really seems unbearable than you know what to you have to do. Remember, each relationship is a learning experience. Sometimes you’re gonna have to kiss a few frogs before the right relationship comes along. I’m not saying my relationship is perfect, it definitely has flaws. My boyfriend and I have had those moments where we have called each other screaming and crying, but at the end of the day we both know no matter where life takes us, we’ll always try our best to be there for one another. It’s not supposed to be easy, but you’re the one who decides what’s right for you. Until next time, I’ll leave you all with this: “Can miles truly separate you from friends? If you want to be with someone you love, aren’t you already there?” – Richard Bach.

Lauren is a Journalism major studying at Penn State Berks for the first two years of college, then at Temple University the remaining two. She's a native of Lancaster, Pa and hopes to live in New York City after graduating. In the future, she plans to incorporate a minor of Music Technology and gear her career toward music journalism. She enjoys writing lyrics and poetry in her spare time, and works at Victoria's Secret PINK.