First of all, I’m still confused as to why dick pics are still a thing. Doesn’t that seem like so five years ago? Haven’t we evolved? Nothing is worse than receiving a picture of a penis, out of the blue, from a complete stranger, or even worse, someone you know!
Most of the time, this results from having a conversation with a guy on an app, like Tinder, or on a social media site. You start talking, maybe flirting a little bit and getting to know each other. Then BOOM, the question. “You wanna see a picture of my dick?” or something along those lines. Regargless of your answer, he’ll usually send you one anyway. Sometimes, If you’re really unlucky, he won’t even ask and just send his little penis portrait right on over. Nice.
Other times, before you even start talking, BAM. A picture of his nether regions, what an introduction! Why? We didn’t ask for that! Will that make us like you more or want to talk to you more? No! The opposite actually. Newsflash to all the guys out there: Most of us don’t want to see a picture of your penis, and if we did, we would ask or say yes to that lovely question you just threw at us. But even if the answer is “no”, you often still send it. Do you not understand? No! As with seeking consent in any other situation, no means no.
If you or someone you know falls victim to the unwanted, unprovoked dick pic, I’m here to help. Here are a few options you have to get the message across…
1. Ignore
Your first option is to just ignore this horrific and uncalled for picture that he just sent to you. In some cases, this might work. In other cases, he might think that you didn’t get the picture and he’ll keep spamming your account or phone until you respond. (Let’s hope it’s never the latter.)
2. Report or Block
This could be effective in the long run. If you use this method, you don’t need to continue to communicate with him, you won’t get spammed and if you report him, and you may be saving many other people from seeing his business. Save a pair of innocent eyes and report this creep, but if you’re feeling more confrontional…
3. Respond
This is a more fun approach. There are so many things that you can say to shut him down forever! Depending on what kind of response you’re going for, there are countless gifs you can send for maximum impact and a good laugh or two.
Polite Response
Now, if you don’t like confrontation or you’re completely and utterly scarred from what your beautiful eyes just saw, this might be your choice. This way you aren’t offending anyone, you’re just reiterating (maybe multiple times) that you don’t want to see his ding dong, and no, you don’t like it. Be prepared, he might not understand the first few times. Be persistent and eventually he should stop bothering you.
Humiliating response
If that’s not your style, you can step it up a notch with your response and make fun of him or his package. For some, this might seem a bit harsh, but he’s just harassed you! If he can’t handle the heat, get his ass out of the kitchen and get him to stop sending unsolicited dick pics! Sometimes it’s best to fight fire with fire. He’s fair game and deserves every mean or humiliating gif you send him, especially if you already told him no.
Aggressive/Angry response
The humiliating response works on some, but not all. To get this bro off your back, show him you’re not playing games. This can be done by being extremely angry and aggressive in the gifs that you choose, or down right crazy. Again, this might be a little extreme, but he’ll get the picture quickly that you want nothing to do with him or his penis, especially if you’ve tried everything else and nothing has worked. But fair warning, if you actually like this guy and like talking to him, this approach might not be the best one because he’ll probably never talk to you again. Got a creepy, random dude on your hands? Perfect.
If after that, he’s still sending you unwanted pictures of his down under, the best choice is to block him and/or report him. That’ll probably be the most effective way to get him to stop, but may not be as fun as responding with a gif. Hopefully it never gets to the point where you need to report him to the police, but if you ever fear for your safety or those around you, please do. People are sketchy, so be smart, and be safe. If you start up a conversation or start flirting with a guy on a social media site or an app, receiving one of these gems is completely possible, so I prepare your eyes and ready your responses, just in case.
Any way you slice it, getting an unwanted dick pic is a major day ruiner. And to all the fellas out there, keep it in your pants, off of our phones and out of our inboxes. Please and thank you.