You’re scrolling down your newsfeed, mindlessly checking up on the lives of your 1,100 Facebook friends. Apparently, they all have a lot going on. Person A from middle school is in Hawaii for the 10 millionth time, and now has an amazingly tropical cover photo. Person B (you can’t remember if he’s your third or fourth cousin) finally got that job promotion and he can’t think of any way that his life could get better right now! Person C, your high school classmate, just thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail. She’s never felt so healthy, physically and mentally.
You can’t help but sigh. You went on Facebook with the intention of curing your boredom and maybe seeking a bit of connection with your far away friends and family, but now the only thing you’re thinking about is how you never go on cool exotic vacations and you don’t have a cool job, let alone a job at all. You’re really bad at hiking, and in general, you’re just unadventurous. Now that you think of it, you’re just so much less wholesome and passionate than all of these beautiful people on your computer screen.
If you have an account on any type of social media, whether on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Tumblr, I’m sure this dull feeling is oh-so-familiar. It’s nearly impossible to go through life without ever comparing yourself to others. While this was true even for our parents 20 years ago, in today’s world – a world centered on the Internet – social comparison is absolutely inescapable.
We all have insecurities, whether they’re regarding our personality, appearance, or abilities. Insecurities are just part of being a real person and that’s fine, but social media encourages us even more so to dwell on them. A recent psychology study has pointed out that with every minute an individual spends on Facebook, he or she is three times more likely than before to feel like his or her life is less wholesome than others.
How do we avoid this? Well, the most obvious way is to delete all of your social media accounts. But, let’s face it; most of us probably won’t do that. The next most obvious way is to minimize your time spent on these websites. If you find yourself aimlessly scrolling on Facebook, try to find the willpower to get off and do something else.
Another way to not let all of this social comparison business get to your head is to remind yourself about the reality of what you are seeing on Facebook, Instagram, etc. You are only seeing the good stuff; social media websites are basically just one big game of “Who Can Give the Most FOMO to the Most People?” Blogger Heidi Nazarudin explains, “What you don’t see are the same things you don’t post about yourself: fights with loved ones, family drama, insecurities, and problems at work.” It just so happens that every one of your Facebook friends has just as many faults as you do.
Lastly, you can steer the negative thoughts from social comparison in a positive direction. As life-coach Amita Patel suggests, “Realize that the comparison [you’re making] is not about the person, but a tool to tell you what you want in life. You need to set goals and use others to inspire you.”
So, go for it. Don’t let social media get the best of you!
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