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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

The Elevator Flirt: How to Get a Guy to Ask You Out in the Length of an Elevator Ride

The elevator pitch is the Little Black Dress of networking—at this point you have one that’s perfectly tailored, all cleaned-up, and a guaranteed way to turn (professional) heads.  But when you’re caught in an elevator with a cute guy instead of a dream boss, that perfect party dress turns into an oversized sweat suit.  You fumble.  You mumble.  You pretend like he’s not there because there are still six more stories of “I-don’t-know-if-I-have-time-to-start-a-conversation-and-I-don’t-want-to-run-into-you-in-the-future-and-be-the-weird-elevator-girl” awkwardness. 
 
Luckily, Her Campus is here to polish up your elevator flirt.  (Or dining hall flirt, or riding the bus together flirt, or waiting in line next to Dane Cook flirt…)  Read on to have guys asking for your number in sixty seconds flat.
 
If you’re on an actual elevator…
This is it.  Your 20-second chance to spark brilliant conversation that will inevitably lead him to whisk you away on a spontaneous trip to the south of France where he’ll fall madly in love with you while eating croissants in your chateau.  Or at least ask you to coffee.  See script with notes:
 
You: (Casually, making sure no watch or cell phone are in view) Hey, do you know what time it is?
Him: (Suavely) Yeah, it’s 6:30.
You: Thanks.  (More under your breath than directly addressing him) I need a watch, I’m pretty sure I’ve never showed up anywhere on time.  (Now directly at him, again) I’m Rachel*, by the way.
Him: I’m [Insert Sexy Name Here].
You: Nice to meet you [Repeat His Sexy Name Here].  Hopefully I’ll see you around campus?
*Use your own name…
 
OK so it’s not Shakespeare, but it gives you a plausible excuse to talk to a stranger without coming off as the star of an America’s Most Wanted special report.  Hopefully you’ll charm him with the ensuing witty banter, and even if you don’t, now you know what time it is.  To follow up, wait two days, find him on Facebook, and send him a friend request with a message that says: “Thanks again for wearing a watch :) Hopefully I’ll run into you again next time I’m running late!”  If he was interested, he’ll write back.
 
You’re in line at Starbucks
The morning coffee rush has its advantages—you have the chance to nod off next to a hot guy while waiting to get your caffeine fix.  (See also: excuse to put off doing homework, laundry, and or class for an extra ten minutes.)  You’re tired, you’re cranky, you’re mad that a latte costs $5, but it’s worth it to stay up late studying this script:
 
You: (More under your breath than directly addressing him) Ugh so many choices! (Now directly at him) Quick: hot or cold?
Him: What? (If he answers, continue to “Thanks…”)
You: I can’t decide if I want a hot drink or a cold drink, it’s always the big Starbucks decision.  So hot or cold?
Him: Hot. (Or cold)
You: Thanks.  There are too many choices too early in the morning.  I’m Rachel*, by the way.
Him: I’m [Insert Sexy Name Here]. 
You: Well thanks for the help.  I’m sure I’ll see you here again?
Him: Yeah, see you around.
*Again, don’t say your name is Rachel. Unless you’re from a Jewish suburb, in which case, your name probably is Rachel. 
 
You did it! Now you have a hot drink in one hand and an even hotter guy in the palm of your other.  (Unfortunately, you’re still out the $5.)  Sit tight for about a day, and then head back to Starbucks where you can friend him on Facebook (free WiFi!).  The accompanying message: “I froze up at Starbucks today because you weren’t there to weigh in hot versus cold.  Hopefully I’ll run into you again soon :)” The best part: you already know where you’re going to have your first date.  Bring a mint. 

 
You’re on a machine at the gym
You know those girls who bring reading to the gym and highlight for class while they’re jogging away on the elliptical? (They’re usually also wearing a perfectly put-together Nike dry-fit ensemble…)  That’s one way to multi-task while burning calories.  An even better way? Try flexing your flirting muscles.  The gym can be the perfect place to meet a cute guy—he’ll be breathing heavily and covered in sweat before you have to do any work! See script:
 
You: Hey, sorry to bother you, but do you know if there’s a time limit on how long you can use this machine?
Him: Yeah I think it’s 30 minutes, but no one really cares if you go longer.
You: OK that’s what I thought, thanks.  I could pretend like I’m mad but it’s secretly an excuse for me to move on to the mats (laughing).
Him: Yeah seriously.
You: This is probably the worst way to make a first impression, considering I’m panting and I can barely breathe, but I’m Rachel*
Him: I’m [Insert Sexy Name Here]. 
*If he’s really cute just say you’re Rachel and give him my number…
 
Hopefully you’ll keep talking (and praying he doesn’t notice how slowly you’re actually running), but if he puts in his headphones and ignores you for the next 29.5 minutes, don’t sweat it.  Once you feel sore from your workout you know you’ve waited long enough, and it’s acceptable to friend him on Facebook.  Include a message like: “It was nice to meet you yesterday! Hopefully I’ll run into you around campus just to prove I don’t ALWAYS look like I do at the gym :)”  
 
In the dining hall
Mmmmmmm cafeteria food.  There’s really nothing more romantic than bonding over poorly cooked meatloaf or dry lettuce in a salad bar.  Even though colleges could definitely work on their meals, most schools have at least a couple delicious men.  Slip these notes under your tray:
 
You: Is the [whatever food he’s standing near] any good?
Him: Yeah, actually.  (Ok I’m being generous, more likely, “No it’s horrible.”)
You: OK thanks.  I’ve found it’s always safer to ask before trying.
Him: (Laughing) I totally agree.
You: (In a flirty, not creepy, tone) I’m going to find you before I leave to let you know if I agree with your taste-testing.
AFTER YOUR MEAL, CASUALLY APPROACHING HIS TABLE WITH ONLY 2 (OR FEWER) OF YOUR FRIENDS
You: You were right, I should’ve trusted you the whole time.  I’m Rachel*, by the way.
Him: I’m [Insert Sexy Name Here]
You: Nice to meet you [Repeat Sexy Name Here].  I’m sure I’ll see you here again.  I might even be brave enough to try the [weird food] just to let you know how it is.
 
Relax.  Digest.  And the next night you can friend him on Facebook.  You already made contact twice (once while admiring the soggy pizza and again at the end of your meal), so no message required.  Bon appetit!
 
At a bar
Remember how your mom told you that all the guys you meet at bars are sleaze-bags? I hate to be the one to break it to you, but your mom is a liar.  Sure, there are some crazies (I’m picturing the 45-year-old man who hangs out at the college hot spot), but good guys go for nights out, too.  So spot someone you like? Try:
 
You: Hey, sorry to interrupt, but I’ll buy you a drink if you take a picture of us!
Him: Yeah sure.
(HE TAKES THE PICTURE)
You: Thanks so much.  I’m Rachel*.  And I’m serious about that drink if you’re interested!
 
Short.  Sweet.  To the point.  Just like the shot you’re about to buy him.  Don’t drink?  “Instead of a beer how about a diet coke and a dance? Fair trade-off?”  No Facebook unless you suck face.  (Vulgar? Sorry. But true.)    He might be Prince Charming, or he might be Prince Charming’s flaky, but equally attractive cousin.  Either way, enjoy!

Rachel Peck is a senior at Barnard College, Class of 2012, where she is majoring in English and Theatre and minoring in Women's, Gender, and Sexuality Studies. Although she admits to actually enjoying high school in her hometown of Bexley, OH, her favorite thing to do is explore her new--slightly more exciting--home, New York City. When she isn't watching good (and bad...) TV, finding excuses to plan dinner with friends, window shopping, or napping, Rachel enjoys working for the Barnard admissions office, serving on her sorority's various boards, and writing for whoever will read it.  You can also follow her on Twitter (@peckrachel) if you're into that.