7. You find out his class schedule and dress up really cute, always making sure you take the same route as he does.
If you can pull this off unnoticed, good for you. But chances are he will start to notice a shadow in his path. This is when things could get weird. When he finds out this shadowy figure is you, he will catch on and tell his friends about the creepy girl who is always following him. He will then change his route and avoid you in any way possible. The worst is when you smile and wave and he doesn’t even notice or acknowledge you. Stop chasing your crush and instead eye f—k the hotties who walk by you every day.
8. You get too drunk and puke all over him.
After one too many mixed drinks, a few shots, and a keg stand, you’re feeling like you did after your 21st birthday celebration. It’s bad enough to puke on yourself, but it’s way worse when you puke on your crush. You’ll be known on campus as the Vomit Comet—not something you ever want to be called. When you get the feeling that things are going to get messy, run to the bathroom or look for the nearest bucket or garbage can, not his brand new Sperry’s. And try not to get that drunk in the first place, for many reasons…
9. You ask him to meet your parents before you are even official.
The whole “meet the parents” thing is already awkward enough. It’s something that should be saved for longer down the road—think after numerous dates, hook-ups, and PDAs. Ask him to meet your friends first. If he gets freaked out by this, do not even think about inviting him to your cousin’s first birthday party. “I was with this guy for about a month and decided to invite him to my grandparents’ anniversary party. Well good thing I didn’t, because a couple days later he sent me a text saying he couldn’t date me anymore and had recently met someone else,” says Vanessa*, a senior at Florida State University. It’s okay if your guy comes over and your parents meet him at the door and they have a little small talk, but don’t plan a formal dinner meeting too soon.
10. You start giving his best girl friend a dirty look every time you see her.
Calm down, girlfriend, there’s more than enough of him to go around. Just because she’s a girl doesn’t mean she’s hooking up with him. It sucks that she’s one of the prettiest girls on campus and knows how to work a crowd, but don’t be intimidated by this. If you give her a dirty look, she’ll most likely relay this message to your crush, and next time you run into him on campus you’ll be the one getting a dirty look. Make peace with his best girl friend any way you can. Do the whole Mean Girls thing and be “frenemies” with her if you have to... it’s better than nothing.
11. He finds you crying outside the bar, for the third weekend in a row.
And to make matters worse, you can’t stop hiccupping. This is the ultimate way to become “that girl". Drunk crying is not only unattractive; it also makes you look weak and pathetic. Yeah, your emotions might act up after having a few too many tequila shots, but save the crying for your best friends, therapist, or even your dog.
Stop committing these little crimes, and your crush might finally feel the same can’t-get-enough, lovely-dovey feelings you feel about him. Let us know how you’ve ruined your chances with your crush and prevent your fellow collegiettes from making the same mistakes by leaving a comment!
