Calling all GUYS: wish you could get inside a girl’s head? Think the Kardashians are some kind of Armenian folk band? Want to know why carnations are a (really) bad choice? Real Live College Girl Allie will now take your questions. Oh, and girls: feel free to send the baffled boys you know this way.
Do sorority girls automatically prefer fraternity guys? I’m not in a fraternity and don’t have a lot of opportunities to party with them. What can I do to get myself in the game?
–Wondering at William and Mary
Dear Wondering,
Wonder no more. I am (don’t get too excited) a “sorority girl,” and while I don’t want to speak for my culture (Greek), I can speak for myself. The answer is no. I don’t automatically prefer a guy simply because he was willing to spend a semester of his life getting paddled by a bunch of raucous (read: wasted) upperclassmen.
You are right though; I do seem to know more guys who are in fraternities than those who aren’t. But don’t you see, Wondering? You have an ADVANTAGE. I don’t see you every weekend. I don’t know what you’re doing. And that’s the fun of it! Girls love mystery. Did you ever wonder why we read all those Nancy Drew books in grade school? Ugh, now my gag reflex is kicking in thinking about that god-awful Emma Roberts movie version that came out in 2007. Anyway, what I’m saying is, use the fact that “sorority girls” don’t know you to your advantage. How do you do this? Let me educate you about a little thing in the Greek system known as a philanthropy event. I’m sure you’ve heard them advertised on campus, but basically, sororities hold glorified fundraisers to benefit philanthropic organizations. They usually require nice people (like you) to show up and donate a couple bucks to the cause. That’s where you come in, Wondering. Next time Zeta Beta Zeta is having Cookies for the Cure, grab a couple buddies and head out. Make nice with a couple sisters, make sure enough girls see your face (so you know, uh, look good), and split. Then you’ll have this situation on your hands:
Srat Girl 1: Did you see that cute guy over by the macaroons?
Srat Girl 2: Yeah, OMG, who was that?
Srat Girl 1: Idk, is he in Omega Chi?
Srat Girl 2: No, I know all the Omega Chis.
Srat Girl 1: Oh you know them alright.
Srat Girl 2: OMG, shut up!
Srat Girl 1: You shut up! Who was that guy?
Srat Girl 2: I think Ashley said he was on the Frisbee Team.
Srat Girl 1: Frisbee Team?
Srat Girl 2: Whatever, let’s go to their next game, or like, match, or something.
Srat Girl 1: Done and done!
You see that, Wondering? They love you! Are you on the Frisbee Team? It was just a guess. Anyway, all you’ve gotta do is make yourself a little bit visible, and all those cute srat stars will be dying to know who you are.
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Sorority girls from the popular TV show Greek (study up) participate in a philanthropy event.
I’m in a long-distance relationship, and although I trust and love my girlfriend, I have a suspicion she’s cheating on me. How can I ask her about this, without offending her?
–Have a Hunch at Harvard
Dear Harvard,
You have a hunch? If you truly trust your GF, why are you suspicious? I know long distance can make you crazy, but if all other aspects of your relationship are kosher, there’s no reason to think she’s cheating. If you still do (think she’s getting around, that is), there is NO GOOD WAY to ask her if this is the case. Think about the possibilities:
- You ask her, and she says no. Commence huge fight. “Are you saying you don’t trust meee?!?!?!??!!!!!”
- You ask her, and she says yes. Well, she’s cheating. There you have it. What are you gonna do?
The thing is, unless you’re one hundred percent sure she’s dogging you, nothing good can come from asking her, and if you’re one hundred percent sure she’s dogging you, what are you still reading this for? Don’t you have a long distance breakup call to make?
If you really think you must say something to her, don’t come right out and accuse her. Ask her a specific question, such as “I noticed you have a lot of recent Facebook pictures with John So-and-So. Is he cool? I’d love to meet him when I visit.” Her reaction should tell you whether to be more or less suspicious. It’s your call from there how to handle it, but know that no one likes their integrity to be questioned, especially by someone they care about.