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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

How to Spend Valentine’s Day in the Friend Zone

So there’s this guy friend that you sorta, kinda maybe have a crush on.

You feel like you couldn’t make your feelings any more obvious to him…

…but he is still totally clueless.

So you’re super surprised when he asks you to come over on Valentine’s Day…

…but then it all makes sense when you go over to his place and he greets you like one of his buddies.

You’re bummed out that he apparently still thinks of you as a friend, because it feels like you’ve been waiting a century for him to make a move.

He invites you in for a beer and turns on the game (it’s almost frustrating how comfortable you two are around each other!)…

…and the two of you hang out like you have a million times before, because you’re “like brother and sister,” as he so devastatingly put it.

In an attempt to escape the friend zone, you scoot closer to him on the couch and try to be sexy.

But you end up looking more like this:

You haven’t quite nailed the flirting thing yet, so you settle with high-fiving him every time your team scores.

As he continues watching the game, you reminisce on any memory with him that could have been mistaken as the beginning of a relationship (like two minutes ago, when you guys shared a high five).

And whenever he gives you a genuine compliment, you over analyze it and think there may be a spark.

But then you compare it with how he actually flirts with other girls…

…and you realize you’re holding on to a hopeless dream.

And the most annoying thing is that you know how good of a couple you two would be!

He asks you if you want another beer, but you decline and instead say:

To which he responds with the worst reply ever:

Second attempt to escape from the friend zone: FAILED.

He tells you that you’re the funniest friend he has, and you sit in his living room like:

You decide that this Valentine’s Day is not a lucky one for you. But it’s whatever, because you really value his friendship and will deal with being just friends…

…but it doesn’t hurt to keep trying. Third time’s the charm?

Connie is a professional and creative writing major at Carnegie Mellon University. She is currently obsessed with pole fitness, pumpkin bread, and '80s fashion.