So, you and your significant other have been getting pretty serious lately. When you picture your future plans, your SO starts to make an appearance. Everything just feels so right between you two… but, something is still missing. You both entertain the idea of moving in together, and come to find that you’d like that dream to become a reality. Still, you want to be absolutely sure that this is the right move for you and your SO. We spoke to several collegiettes about five telltale signs that you and your SO are ready to move in together, because you’ll want to be sure it feels right!
1. You’re practically living together already
You’ve cluttered their bathroom counter with your makeup, hair ties and bobby pins, and they’ve got a toothbrush and some pajama pants stuffed in one of your dresser drawers. Their roommates refer to you as one of their own, and they know not to use your shower at 7:15 a.m. because that’s when your roomie uses it.
Sure, you both enjoy your free time every now and then, but if the two of you are pretty much living together already, it’s a good chance that you’re ready to make it official in your own place. Plus, there are added benefits to turning places between the two of you into one, says Megan Scavo, a junior at the University of Central Florida. “If you practically live together (staying the night together at each other’s places), why not move in together and save money?”
Being comfortable with sharing each other’s space and spending most of your nights together during the week is a huge sign that you’re ready to make the move with your SO because you’re already sharing the bulk of the experience together (ya know, like morning breath and disheveled bedhead or grocery shopping for the dinner you’re going to make that night). Yes, there are more commitments that come with sharing a place together, but at this point, it’s worth a shot!
2. You’ve been dating for a significant amount of time
Every relationship is certainly unique and moves at its own pace. Therefore, there’s no one answer to how much time together is enough time to justify major life decisions such as moving in with your SO, because the answer is specific to you and your relationship. “If you have been dating for a significant amount of time and are sure that you won’t get tired of each other, it’s safe to move in,” Megan explains.
A significant amount of time together can mean something different for every couple, but you wouldn’t want to move in with your SO before getting to know them, right? If you’re a neat freak, you’d want to have been with your SO long enough to know whether they are too or not before moving together.
Taking the time to get to know your partner and understand their living habits and preferences is very important in any relationship. If you both can agree that your time together signifies taking that next step together, then that’s definitely a sign you’ll want to take into consideration!
3. You have open communication
You’ve probably heard the saying “communication is key” a thousand times over, but it’s no lie! Norris Goldflies, a junior at the University of Illinois at Chicago, knows that communication is essential for a healthy relationship to flourish. “You definitely want to make sure you and your SO really know how to communicate if you’re thinking of moving in together,” she says.
Not only is communication important for a relationship to function smoothly, it’s also a huge sign of whether you and your SO are ready to move in together or not. Living under the same roof comes with plenty of conversations that range from, “Wait, it’s my turn to do the dishes?” to, “We need cut back on spending to make rent this month.”
If you and your partner can openly communicate with each other, especially when it comes to the tough subjects, then it’s a huge indicator that you’re ready to be under one roof together.
4. You’re able to make compromises without a fuss
Compromise, compromise, compromise. Relationships involve giving and taking, so if you and your SO have been considering moving in together, you’ll definitely want to be well-versed in the art of compromise. Rachna Shah, a freshman at Dartmouth College, says a good sign that you’re ready to move in together is that “you know how to compromise, and plan on doing so. Not just on what Netflix TV show to watch—though that is important!—but on accepting each other for who you are.”
Being open and willing to compromise with your SO is not only a great sign for living together, but it’s also a huge indicator that you respect your partner’s needs. “If you’re constantly keeping your SO’s opinions in mind and considering them, it’s a good sign that you’re ready to move in together,” Rachna says, because respecting each other is necessary when sharing the same living space!
Related: When it’s Good to Compromise in Your Relationship (& When it’s Bad)
5. It doesn’t feel right not coming home to your SO
You know the feeling. You’ve spent the whole day away from your significant other, and when you come through the door after that long day, you want nothing more to be greeted by them with Netflix loaded and dinner made. A huge sign, and perhaps the most relatable one that you’re ready to move in together, is that you can’t imagine coming home without your SO there to greet you.
“I knew I was ready to move in with my boyfriend after we spent a week house sitting for his parents,” says Norris. “It didn’t feel right not coming home to him. Now, after living together for a year, we just bought a condo!” When the thought of not coming home to your SO every night leaves your heart feeling a little empty, moving in together can help you fill in that missing piece.
Moving in together with your SO is a huge commitment that shouldn’t be taken lightly, so hopefully these five significant signs can send some reassurance your way. Knowing the signs and doing what’s best for you and your relationship makes all the difference when it comes to finally moving in together!