How to Not Overshare Your Engagement on Social Media

Okay, we all know that one person who tends to share WAY TOO MUCH on social media. Then the time comes when you see the one picture of their ring. Your heart stops beating. The earth starts to move. The time has come. They got engaged.

Maybe you’re single and you don’t think it’d ever happen to you, so you don’t sweat it. But maybe you’re in a pretty serious relationship and you see it happening sometime in the near future. After the excitement of the thought subsides, your first impulse is how you’d share it on social media.

No, I’m not implying that you’re a millennial and we share EVERYTHING. You may have family members who weren’t able to make it to the engagement, or friends from out of state that wanted to see pictures. It’s easier to just post everything up so everyone can see it, rather than sending stuff one-by-one to a million curious people. So how do we stop ourselves from over sharing or sharing too much of this special moment?

It’s about the proposal—not the ring

It seems like everyone’s first thought is to post their hand with that shiny rock on their left ring finger. It’s almost like you’re flaunting the ring more than your future husband or wife. Being proposed to is probably one of the most special moments in your life—and your first instinct is to post a picture of the ring? Come on.

Chelsea Nicole, a junior at Iowa State University, had some advice from an outsider’s perspective. She had a better alternative to pictures of oversized rocks.

“While photos of you and your SO might seem like you’re still bragging about your engagement, I think of it as a cute way to show off a new step in your relationship in a healthy way, rather than showing off material aspects like the ring,” She says.

Sharing special moments with your SO rather than the ring they bought you says a lot about the kind of relationship you have with that person. Sharing the ring first will give everyone the impression that the most important thing about this new step in your life is the rock it came with.

Related: 6 Relationship Things You Should NEVER Post About on Social Media

Cut back on posting a billion pictures

A couple of cute pictures showing off your look of surprise or your first kisses together as finances is pretty cute. Have a full stop right there. There’s no need for the thousands of photos taken that day. Granted—it all depends on where you’re posting them. Facebook is fine because you can group a whole bunch of pictures together. Instagram? Not so much. You don’t want your friends sliding through 50 pictures in just one post. Know your audience and where you’re posting.

“My sister and her fiancé didn't change their relationship status to ‘engaged’ or put up a bunch of pictures; he did one post with three pictures in it with no captions, and that was all,” Katrina Dejagger-Kennedy says. “She changed her profile picture to one of the photos and that was all she did. Which I thought was classy and understated – sharing the news but not shoving it in people's faces.”

This was a great way to share the news without saying too much. ‘Okay, we’re engaged, here’s how, thanks a lot for your well wishes.’ Boom. Simplicity at its finest. Maybe you want to share a bit more pictures, and that’s okay too. But post them all at once and leave it. Spreading and sprinkling pictures of the moment around for a year after the engagement is a bit much.

Does EVERYTHING have to be on social media?

If you overshared your engagement, chances are you overshare a lot of other things. Social media is meant for your great aunt and uncles or distant cousins to see pictures of you and see how your life is going. An engagement is a great thing to share on social media—your friends will be so happy for you and family will be excited for the wedding. But remember its about the meaning behind the event rather than the likes you’ll get on the pictures. Just keep that in mind before you hit the post button.

“How to not overshare proposals: spend more time with the one who proposed. Why are you even sharing this when you finally locked it down for yourself?” Says Afif Samir Nasreddine, a grad from University of Florida.

It’s true—After he/she proposed the pictures are IMMEDIATELY posted up. Why? People don’t have to know the very second you get engaged. Enjoy the moment with your SO and celebrate with those who were able to make it to the engagement.

Related: 5 Ways Social Media is Hurting Your Relationship

I’m not saying that being proposed to should be kept hush hush. Sharing the happy news is great! A lot of people will be happy and excited for you. Just be aware about what you actually want people to know. Remember, that moment is about you and your fiancé, not about your 200 Facebook friends. On the other hand, screw it. It’s your day and you’re allowed to be happy and show it off.