Real Live College Guy Sean: My Summer Fling Is Being Distant

Broke from calling late night love lines for advice? Looking for the lowdown on the hoedown when it comes to college guys? Real Live College Guy Sean is here to help you pick apart the mind of the average college guy. Whether it’s avoiding that awkward weekend hook-up, or full-on relationship advice, Sean is here to save the day!

I went on vacation to Chicago for a weekend this summer and I met a guy who worked at Urban Outfitters. I guess we flirted and hit it off because he offered to take me out and show me around the city. I had an amazing time with him, we had a lot in common and there weren't any awkward moments, which I thought there might be seeing as he was a complete stranger. We eventually hooked up and wow... he was the best I ever had.

After that weekend, I went back home not thinking too much of it but we did exchange a few texts over the next two weeks. Eventually, we began to Skype every night. We stayed up and talked until the early morning about everything, he started telling me all thing things we would do and places we would go if I went back to Chicago, and how he wanted visit me here in Boston, and even where we would go on vacation together...

After a week of Skype dates, he asked me to call him the next night which I did and he never answered. I tried again the next night and the night after but still no answer. He eventually texts me a few days later saying that he "keeps falling asleep" (I did call him quite late because I don't finish work until 11pm, but it never bothered him before).

What happened? What changed? - Broken Promises at BU

We’ve all been there. You’ve finally met that perfect person and the two of you hit it off perfectly. You go to art galleries together, have the same tastes in wine and cheese, the works. Problem is, they’re too far away when real life sets in. It’s almost a rite of passage for love and it can sometimes feel like the world is falling apart around you.

For many college couples, one of the key factors for maintaining a healthy relationship is proximity. A quick Google search tells me that a drive from Chicago to Boston measures over 950 miles, about seventeen hours of singing “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall,” give or take. For someone whom you’ve just met during the summertime, that’s quite an intimidating distance.

This Chicago guy sounds like Prince Charming and it looks like he is very interested in you. Perhaps the reason he’s been so hesitant to call or answer you is because he is trying to come to terms with this distance. He should, however, man up and communicate this to you rather than leave you in the dark. If he still hasn’t given you a proper explanation for why he’s been so distant, that’s bad on him. You’ve done everything in your power to keep that summer spark alive. Your persistence is admirable, but if he has stopped talking to you because he is scared of your reaction, I question his morals. Feeling guilty for potentially hurting someone’s feelings is no reason to lead someone on. I’d give him one last chance, and when you get down to talking, mention the distance factor and ask for his thoughts on it, but keep in mind that it may not be the answer that you’re looking for.

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