If you’re a girl like me, reading has always been an escape from the everyday. And even though my reading tastes have changed (leaning more towards Cosmo than Winnie the Pooh), I can still grab my old copy of Harry Potter off the shelf and read the book cover to cover in a single night. Thinking back to our girlhoods, we realize that many of our first life lessons came from reading our favorite children’s books. From Dr. Seuss we learned to use our imaginations and think outside the box; thanks to The Babysitters Club, we learned that you can always rely on your closest best friends; and all of our biggest questions about puberty from first kisses to trainer bras were answered by Judy Blume. And lately, I’ve been on the hunt for children’s books that teach lessons. Not academic lessons, mind you. As collegiettes buried in textbooks for finals, we have plenty of that kind. I’m talking about lessons in love.
But what do these beloved books from our youth have to do with dating you ask? Everything. There are a ton of books from our childhood that taught us valuable life lessons on growing up, including dating, relationships, and all things love! Check our reading list of the lessons in love we learned from our favorite childhood books!
The Giving Tree
“Once there was a tree and she loved a little boy. And every day the boy would come and he would gather her leaves and make them into crowns and play king of the forest… And the boy loved the tree very much. And the tree was happy.”
The Giving Tree chronicles the relationship between a boy and a tree. In the beginning, they’re playmates, but the boy grows a little bit older and starts to come around less often. This saddens the tree. When he eventually returns he’s grown up and, gradually, he takes everything she has to offer, harvesting her apples, and stripping her of her limbs until she’s nothing more than a stump. But even in the end, she loves the boy who is now an old man.
Lesson learned: Be giving, but don’t give up too much of yourself.
When I was a little girl, reading Shel Silverstein’s The Giving Tree always made me cry. Now, it confuses me: is the tree selfless or just self-sacrificing? This story silently speaks volumes about unconditional love and the dangers of being in a one-sided relationship. Maybe I’ve become a cynic in my years of dating, since true “givers” are few and far between on my campus, but looking at this story now, this sounds like a toxic relationship. Seriously, could she be more desperate? She’s willing to let the boy cut her whole trunk down so he can make a boat! No relationship is worth giving up everything about who you are. Take advice from the tree, be giving. Just don’t end let him cut you down to a stump by your relationship’s end.
The Cat in the Hat
Everyone’s favorite doctor, Dr. Seuss, has been letting us into his kooky and colorful imagination for years. From The Cat in the Hatto Green Eggs and Ham, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas, he could entertain us with wacky, wonderful worlds and teach life lessons at the same time, making it fun to learn. But out of all of Dr. Seuss’s life lessons, what can he teach us about love and relationships? Try The Cat in the Haton for size. The picture story rhymes of two little kids, brother and sister, who are stuck bored at home one rainy day while their mother is out. The Cat visits, performing tricks and causing mischief, but making a lot of fun for the kids.
Lesson learned: Have fun in your relationship and think outside the box!
Try new things, be creative. Do things out of the ordinary. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut in relationships or a string of boring dinner-and-a-movie first dates. But The Cat in the Hatshows us that you can make your ownfun together. Turn a boring day into an exciting one. Stuck indoors on a rainy day together? Why not bring out the little kid in bothof you and dance in the rain? You know you’ve always wanted to recreate that scene from The Notebook. You’re only limited by your own imagination. The Cat in the Hatteaches us how to let our imaginations run wild.
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The Babysitters Club
Don’t tell me you haven’t heard of these girls! They were the best friends we never had. Kristy, Claudia, Stacey, Mary Anne, Dawn, Mallory and Jessi: seven girls who took on the world of babysitting while tackling everyday disasters, wild and crazy kids, local mysteries, and boys. Stacey was the “boy-crazy” girl of the club and, undoubtedly, she had the worst luck when it came to teen dating.
She always had crushes on either the jerk types or the really inappropriately older boys (especially given the fact that she was 13-years-old). Like, who can forget lifeguard Scott from Boy-Crazy Stacey? In this particular novella of the series, Scott has Stacey (and the rest of his fan girl club) running up and down the beach to fetch him ice cold sodas. But head-over-heels Stacey refuses to see him for the player that he is, until she sees him on a date with another girl and gets her heart broken. Or what about later in the series when she falls in love with her substitute math teacher, Mr. Wesley Ellenburg, in Stacey’s Big Crush? She pours her heart out to him in a love note, but, of course, he doesn’t return the sentiment and Stacey is left heartbroken.
Lesson learned: Keep your head clear when falling head over heels.
Poor Stacey. She always reminded me of one of my own “boy-crazy” friends. You know, that girl who is neversatisfied unless she’s in a relationship? But the fact of the matter is that’s hardly a healthy attitude towards dating. So learn from Stacey’s heartbreaks: keep a clear head, even when you’re falling in love. As a side note and additional lesson: remember that even if your relationship with that campus cutie doesn’t work out, your girls will always be there to take care of you.
Peter Pan
As little collegiettes, we loved to be whisked away on magical adventures to Neverland (“the second star to the left and on ‘til morning”) with a little boy named Peter Pan. His adventures as the leader of the The Lost Boys gang led him to escapades with Indians and swashbuckling pirates, not to mention dangerous rendezvous with the dastardly Captain Hook. The Darling children, Wendy, John, and Michael, were plunged into this amazing world. Why would Wendy ever want to leave Neverland?
Lesson learned: Dating guys who are “all fun” doesn’t last long.
“The boy who wouldn’t grow up”- sounds like some of our ex-boyfriends, doesn’t it? Most likely, you’ve dated a Peter Pan type yourself, since there are plenty of Guys Who Won’t Grow Up roaming around campus. It’s what a lot of people refer to as “The Peter Pan Syndrome” and it’s something to be wary of. At first, his spontaneity and sense of adventure brings out the kid in you and there’s nothing wrong with having fun. But there comes a time when the fun-loving guy who is the life of the party crosses over into unreliable and irresponsible. In the movie version of Peter Pan, Peter tells Wendy, “Forget about them, Wendy. Forget them all, and come with me where you’ll never, never have to worry about grown-up things again.” But by story’s end, Wendy goes back to London. The point is if a seemingly charming, fun-loving guy says something like that to you, you might want to think twice about becoming a resident of Neverland.
After reading and reliving your memories with some of these childhood classics, you might realize the insight they had to our grown-up relationships and dating experiences. It might be time to pull that old picture book from the box in your attic and look at it in a new way. You’ll come to realize that most of these bedtime stories had a moral or better yet, a happily ever after. Here’s to finding your own happy ending, collegiettes.