The Five Love Languages

By this point in your life, you have probably heard of love languages. You may have a general idea of what a love language is or have a vast knowledge of them. If you have no idea what love languages are or have never even heard of them before, you're in luck!

The idea of love languages came from Dr. Gary Chapman. As a marriage counselor, he would notice patterns between couples saying that they didn't feel any love from their partner. When he asked them how their partner could show their love better, the answers all seemed to fall into one of five categories, which soon became known as love languages.

 Love languages are extremely important since they are the way that we like to receive and show love in our relationships with others. Lately, I've been thinking about love languages a lot, as I've been finding it harder to find time to connect with the people I care about due to the pandemic, school, work, and other things. Before, I could always rely on spending quality time with people I cared about to connect with them, but now that isn't always an option. Luckily there are five different love languages to choose from to show people you care about them. 

  1. 1. Quality Time

    The first love language I'll talk about is quality time. This one is pretty self-explanatory; it's spending time with your loved ones! Making special plans with them and making sure you're not distracted when you're with them is a great way to show you care. Almost everyone enjoys spending quality time with friends, family, and their partners, so this is a common love language on both the giving and receiving end.

  2. 2. Physical Touch

    This one is also pretty self-explanatory. Giving hugs or massages are great examples of physical touch. With this one especially, I think it is important to remember that this may not be everyone's top love language. It definitely isn't mine. I don't mind a hug but I'm not a super touchy person. Just because the person may not be super physical, doesn't mean they don't love you! They may just show it in a different way.

  3. 3. Receiving Gifts

    There's nothing like a surprise gift waiting for you when you get home from school or work. Whether it's a something small on a random day, or a special, sentimental gift for a birthday, gifts can have a lot of meaning for some people. Plus, it can be fun to surprise loved ones with something cute and meaningful when they are least expecting it! It lets them know that you were thinking about them.

  4. 4. Words of Affirmation

    This a top love language for me. Someone telling me that they're proud of me or complementing something about my personality is one of the best things in my opinion. It makes me feel a lot more connected to that person and it makes me feel special to them. Giving a loved one a complement, whether it be on their personality, their outfit, something they did recently, or anything else can be super important. A lot of people want to know for sure that they are valued and loved and giving them words of affirmation is a great way to do that.

  5. 5. Acts of Service

    Hearing that this was a love language is what got me interested in love languages in the first place. I had never considered before that simple little things like cleaning up the dishes after your loved one makes dinner or picking something up from the store for them could mean so much to someone. I soon came to realize that this is my primary love language and I hadn't even known. 

It is important when thinking about the five love languages to remember that your loved one may have a different love language than you, and how they show their love may be different from how they prefer to receive love. Take some time to reflect about your loved ones and the things they seem to appreciate the most. The more often you use their love language, the more appreciated they will feel, and everyone will be happy.