Whether you’ve been in a relationship or not, we’ve probably all seen the red flags at one point or another. It’s important to live life to the fullest, so don’t let a relationship prevent you from doing so. Sometimes it’s hard to signal when it’s time to let go or even accept the fact that you’re relationship is headed down a bad path, so here at Her Campus Xavier, we’ve come up with 11 ways to know when it’s time to break up.
1. They’re controlling: Nothing about a controlling relationship is okay. If your significant other is controlling your every move, then remove yourself from that situation. Controlling relationships can be very unhealthy, and it’ll only get worse as the relationship goes on. You’ll find yourself feeling that you owe an explanation for everything that you do, and you’ll become hesitant to do things that make you happy because they don’t ‘allow’ you to.
2. They’re cheating: No one wants to be in a relationship where their significant other isn’t faithful to them. You deserve to be fully loved not disrespected. Don’t submit yourself to a relationship where your partner is involved with someone else or even various other people. Find someone dedicated to loving and treating you right.
3. You’re not being true to yourself: If you feel like you have to act like someone else to be with your significant other, then it’s time to break it off. Find yourself, love yourself, and be proud of the person that you are. You’ll find someone who loves the real you, inside and out, and appreciates you for who you are.
4. They constantly put you down: There’s nothing worse than someone making you feel like you aren’t good enough. If the person you’re with doesn’t appreciate you, then it’s time to let go. No one deserves to be put down, especially by someone who is such an integral part of your life.
5. Your partner constantly holds onto the past: If your significant other talks too much about the past, such as about his/her ex, it may be time to cut it off. One of the most important aspects of a relationship is to live in the present and holding onto the past can hurt the relationship’s progression.
6. They don’t trust you – and there’s no reason behind it: If nothing in particular happened that caused your partner to not trust you, then that relationship is likely to go downhill, fast. They question every picture or conversation that you have with people that they believe you’re interested in, constantly thinking that it’s something more. It gets irritating when someone has no reason to not trust you, because then they end up questioning your every move. Trust is the foundation of a relationship, so if your partner can’t find it within them to trust you, then it may be time to throw in the towel.
7. Different future goals: Sometimes people have goals and ambitions different than their significant others, and that’s okay. This may be a sign to go in different directions… literally. If it’s meant to be, it certainly will be.
8. They don’t understand boundaries: Sometimes our significant others don’t know where to draw the line. If your partner has no respect for you and seems to be interested in other people on the regular, then that might be a sign that they don’t really care about your relationship. They may cross the line and aggressively flirt with other people, maybe even going past that. There’s nothing fun about watching your partner get up close and personal with another person, specifically on an intimate level. Take this as a sign to move onto someone who will take your relationship more seriously.
9. You barely resolve conflicts and constantly fight: For a relationship to work, being able to work things out is essential. Having constant fights is very unhealthy and hindering of a relationship. Relationships should be about loving one another, not constantly picking at each other and fighting about every single thing. If you can’t work things out, then the relationship is bound to head further down the rocky road that it’s already traveling on.
10. Your relationship lacks communication: Communication is KEY. Without it, the relationship will probably suffer. Lack of communication usually leads to fights because you’re both confused about each other’s true feelings and desires.
11. They’re abusive: There is NOTHING okay about an abusive relationship. If you notice your significant other beginning to become aggressive, then get out by whatever means necessary. If abuse occurs in the relationship, break off the relationship right away. No matter how much you love someone, abuse is never an excuse. DON’T make excuses for them. Break it off, report it, do whatever you can – but don’t stay with them.
If one or even several of these hold true, then it may be time to move on. Take them into consideration and think for yourself, because you don’t deserve to be in an unhealthy relationship. Remember, trust your instincts and know that you’ll have people to support you through this breakup.