What does it mean to “Pay it forward”?
The phrase was an attempt to start a ripple effect for acts of kindness. The principle behind paying it forward is to take what you feel as a recipient of a good deed, turn around, and do something good for another person.
Starbucks recently launched a Pay it Forward campaign that actually has their customers paying it forward. It works like this: Starbucks customers pay for someone behind them; the free-giving customer gets a free tall coffee. On their website, Starbucks says this campaign is not a means to an end, but rather “an acknowledgment of commonality and humanity.” The company hopes that this small, good deed will inspire people to do good for others and bring people closer together, starting with Starbucks coffee.
In an ideal world, people would find inspiration in helping each other. They would decide that doing good for others, even if others aren’t worse off, is worth it. The chain reaction wouldn’t stop at the first, second, or third person to receive, but would keep going until the world was an ever-going cycle of people doing good for others, not worrying about gaining anything tangible in return.
With that being said, is Starbucks’ campaign really all that great? Sure, you buy a person her favorite drink, and you get a free tall coffee in return, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Is Starbucks giving customers free coffee—heck, free stuff—and training them to think that they will receive something every time they give?
If you’re giving to people solely because of the payout you’ll receive, you’re doing it for the wrong reasons. Charities that give something in return for making an investment in their company have it all wrong. A photo of a child you’re sponsoring is fine. World Visions’s child support program that gives you their address to send your child gifts and letters is totally fine. It’s just that…when you watch TV and see a program that says it’ll send you a book for pledging to give thirty dollars for the next year, and they’ll send you a promoting ornament or you get a giant sticker that draws attention to your donation, that’s where problem occurs.
The truth is that, for acts of service, there won’t always be someone there to congratulate you and scratch your back for scratching someone else’s. Sometimes giving to people can be hard because others might seem unappreciative. If you give your time on Sunday to The Mission to serve dinner to the homeless, many times you will not receive a simple “thank you.” Some are truly appreciative while others, as upsetting as it is, will have a sense of entitlement toward your gift. What you have to do in these more-often-than-not situations is realize that you have a higher purpose for donating your time. You are not doing it for credit. You are doing it because you have a desire to pay it forward, to help other people with the extra that you have.
That is ultimately what the Pay it Forward Foundation wants us to do. They want us to respond out of our excess, whether material or immaterial, and give to those who may not have it but need it. (I don’t believe they want us to do good things for others based on how much we get in return. I don’t think they want us to get upset when we don’t receive credit for our work.)
How can you pay it forward for someone today? Choose your roommate, a parent, a co-worker, or someone you’ve never met! Pay for that person’s Big Mac at McDonald’s. Write a note to a friend who has a big test; slip it into his mailbox. Do something to help someone. The feeling you’ll get for having helped someone’s day is a greater payoff than you’ll ever find in a fake gold ornament, a sticker, or a tall Starbucks coffee.