No matter what type of relationship you’re in–whether it’s a friendship, a significant other, or a family member–some relationships just aren’t healthy. Sometimes, we don’t even realize how bad of a mess we have gotten ourselves into until something drastic happens, making us question whether or not this is normal. Or maybe it takes someone pointing it out to see that it’s time for a change. But how can you tell if a relationship is toxic? What are the dangers of a toxic relationship? How do you end an unhealthy relationship? Keep on reading to find out.
First, here are some signs your relationship just isn’t healthy…
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You have been unhappy for a significant amount of time, and you feel like you’re miserable more often than not
- You have lower self esteem since this person has been in your life
- You feel belittled and devalued
- You go out of your way to make this person happy, but everything you do is undermined or unappreciated
- There’s a struggle for control
- This person is verbally critical
- Things get physical when arguing
It’s important to note that these signs may not be directly applied to just the victim, but also the perpetrator. Relationships take two, so generally just one person is not to blame.
So now that you know what an unhealthy relationship looks like, it’s important to understand just how dangerous they can be. Toxic relationships are serious, and often involve one or more forms of abuse. Whether it’s mental, physical, or verbal, all are equally dangerous. Unhealthy relationships can lead to extreme jealousy, depression, physical assault, low self-esteem, anxiety, and in worst case scenarios, even death. So how do you get out of a toxic relationship?
If your relationship just isn’t working, here are some tips on how to end it:
- Don’t be in denial. Once you come to terms with the fact that sometimes things just don’t work out, it will make the transition a lot easier on you.
- Once you realize what the issues are, don’t ignore them. A lot of the time people choose to pretend the problems aren’t there. In cases like this, they don’t realize that they are just prolonging the misery associated with an unhealthy relationship.
- For the time being, cut off contact with this person. (Yes, this includes Facebook stalking as well.) You need time to heal, and by checking your ex’s status updates every day, you’re not giving yourself the chance to do so.
- Surround yourself with positive people. Having people who love and support you is crucial. These are the people who will help give you strength, no matter what type of difficult time you may face.
- Do things that make you happy. Get out there and be passionate about something. Take up a new hobby, treat yourself to a day at the spa, have a girl’s night out, and do things that make you smile again.
- Be proactive in your own life. Don’t sit back and watch life pass you by. Just because a relationship is over doesn’t mean your life is. Don’t be afraid to try something new and take a risk. You never know what life has in store for you.
Ending any kind of relationship is difficult, but if you try to apply some of these tips it should help you move on. Everybody deserves a chance at a loving, meaningful relationship, so even though it may be scary letting go, in the long run it’s worth it. Comment and tell us if any of these tips could be useful to you or someone you know.
Editor: Noel Carlson