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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Wisconsin chapter.

Long distance can be a very sensitive subject: you either believe it will work or you don’t. Personally, I did not expect to be going into college in a committed relationship, especially one where we are over 300 miles apart. However, life throws many curve balls, and people tend to come into your life at the most unexpected times. Although it’s not easy, and finding the right balance can be a challenge, I wouldn’t change a thing. In the end, I like to believe that everything happens for a reason. I’m so grateful that he came into my life, even if the timing was far from ideal. 

Only a short three months ago, I was sitting around a bonfire at my own graduation party, talking all night to the most incredible guy I have ever met. It was an amazing conversation — the kind that seems so easy and can go on for hours without realization. Fast forward another two months, and this incredible guy I met is now my boyfriend. Unfortunately, we are at colleges five hours apart with no means of transportation either way. To say long distance is easy would be an absolute lie, however, I do strongly believe it is possible to make it work if you want it bad enough.

 

The adjustment from high school to college has been an extreme change. It seems like homework and studying is never ending, and then trying to find the right amount of time for yourself on top of this is a challenge. With such a busy schedule, it is really difficult to find time to talk to my boyfriend everyday. We make the effort to talk at least once a day over the phone, but even when we do, it’s obviously not the same. Don’t get me wrong, I’m extremely grateful for the ability to Facetime and would be lost without it. However, this is one of the unfortunate truths about long distance relationships in college: you are extremely busy all of the time. 

 

Something that can be very prominent in relationships, especially when it comes to long distance, is jealousy. Therefore, I believe the basis of any relationship is trust and honesty. Although it can be difficult at times to say what is on your mind, I’ve learned that it is extremely beneficial in the long run. Bottling up feelings does not resolve problems, it only makes them worse. My boyfriend and I have made it a point to always talk about what is on our mind, no matter how difficult it may be. I often find myself getting upset about not being able to be with him on the daily, but I trust him enough that this is going to work out. Long distance would not be possible without the establishment of trust and communication. 

 

 

One of the concepts that is taken for granted in regular relationships is the ability to just be in each other’s presence: knowing you are able to give them a hug when they are upset, able to lay together and talk for hours, and even just able to hold hands. It’s the simple things you miss the most when you are apart for long periods of time. In general, college is a huge part of your life; you’re starting to discover more about your interests and building a future. There are a ton of new experiences, and it really sucks that it has to be done apart from each other. At least I know I will never take one second spent together for granted.

It’s pretty clear to see that long distance is far from easy. Like any relationship, it involves work, yet maybe just a little more comes with the distance. However, I believe that if anyone wants a relationship bad enough, there is no point in calling it quits just because of the distance barrier. With effort from both people and the establishment of trust, it is possible to make it work. Plus, the feeling you get when you see each other after a long time is one of the best feelings in the world, and it makes you remember why it is all worth it. I knew the second I met this boy that he was going to stay, and I wouldn’t change a thing. When you find the right person, distance means nothing.

Maddie Bergstrom

Wisconsin '23

Maddie Bergstrom is a sophomore at the University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Journalism and Psychology. She enjoys movie nights, listening to music, fashion and spending time with friends.