Your parents coming to visit you for a weekend at college can be stressful, but it does not have to be.
The further we go into the semester as college students, the work starts to pile up and midterms that used to be a month away are suddenly next week. Overall, it is a very stressful time in the semester. This also happens to be around the same time your parents start to miss you like crazy, and fortunately for them this is the time of year parents weekend tends to occur. A weekend that for many of us could be another added stresser to look forward to.
Now do not get me wrong, I love my parents, and I love when they plan to come visit me at school, as I am sure many other college students feel the same way. But that does not mean you are ready for those awkward questions your parents are going to want to ask you and those famous lectures you constantly got growing up about making sure you stay on track with your academics. For me, the awkward questions consisted of “Why are there empty bottles of liquor used as decor?” And “Where were you Ubering at 2 AM last weekend?” As for lectures, my dad alway likes to say to me, “We do not make you work because school is your job, make sure you are doing your job correctly.” I mean he makes a fair point, but these types of conversations are a lot easier to avoid when your parents are miles away from where you live.
We live completely new lives here in college, and for those of us who are from out of state, our parents have no clue what our new lives are like. With that being said also means that our typical schedule does not cater to having our parents with us here, which can be problematic if you do not plan ahead.
Here are a few things to consider when preparing for your parents to visit:
plan time for yourself
If you are like me, you are a person who easily gets overwhelmed when a million questions are being thrown at you at once. My social battery also tends to drain quickly sometimes, and I prioritize my alone time to recharge. If you are someone who also prioritizes alone time regularly, this should not change during your parents weekend. For parents weekend, you want to avoid taking out your frustration from your social battery being drained on your parents, so make sure you schedule in some alone time.
clean your room
Make your parents proud and show them how much of an adult you are now. Whether you grew up cleaning and doing chores or had a cleaning service your whole life, it does not matter. Your parents will still be impressed to see your place in proper shape. When I say clean your room, I mean clean it like you have never cleaned it before. This is not one of those cleaning jobs where your task is to just make your room appear clean. Parents see right through that. It actually needs to be thoroughly sanitized. That toilet you had your head in last weekend, clean it. That overflowing trash can, take it out. The sheets you have been sleeping in since you moved in, wash them. That huge pile of laundry you have on the floor, yeah… wash that too. Spraying Febreze this time is not going to be enough. This time, when you clean your room, make sure it smells at least somewhat sanitary and then spray that Febreze for an extra layer of freshness. A bonus would be to ask a friend you do not live with to check your place out and let them be the judge, just in case you have become nose blind to your own disgusting smells. A plus to this step is that by doing a deep clean before your parents visit is a good excuse to get all the chores done that you have been procrastinating. Even once your parents visit is over, you’ll be left with a room that is ideally as clean as it was when you moved in, and I promise that will feel extremely refreshing.
Plan ahead academically
What I mean by this is get as much work and studying done for your classes before your parents arrive. This step is pretty simple if you plan accordingly. It is also ok if you need to do work while your parents are here, and I am sure they will understand as long as it is not so much work that you are unavailable a majority of the weekend. Last year when my parents visited in the fall for UW’s parents weekend, I had three midterms scheduled for the following week, and I was not prepared for any of them. Not only did I spend a majority of the weekend studying and not spending time with my parents, but even when I was spending time with them I was so stressed that it was hard to enjoy being with them.
plan a time to give your parents a tour
Your parents do not know campus the way you do, so help them out and walk them around campus to help them form a mental map. Helping them understand more of where they are will also help you out in the future if you ever have to ask your parents to meet you somewhere. If they have already walked by it once, they will at least have a bit of a clue on how to navigate where to go without your help. A fun thing to do would also be to take your parents to the school building you have classes in and take them inside to point out your specific classrooms or favorite study spots.
make restaurant reservations ahead of time
This is your opportunity to show your parents your favorite restaurants on or near campus. I definitely would take advantage of the free sit-down meals parents weekend has to offer. Forget the dining hall for the weekend because your parents will definitely not like that. Madison has some amazing upscale restaurants, especially around the state capital. The thing about these restaurants is that they always have limited availability for tables and are normally fully booked on weekends. To save yourself the trouble, plan ahead of time and make reservations at your favorite restaurants at least a week before. Worst comes to worst and you do not have a reservation, I would call the restaurants and ask if they have room at the bar to sit at because you might get lucky that way. I also want to mention that you must make sure your parents try a serving of cheese curds if they have never had any before.
Then, as your parents weekend comes to an end, be sure to thank them for coming. This is probably the most important thing you should do during your parents weekend. In the end, make sure they know that you are happy they came. Unless you are not happy that they came, then I guess do as you, please. Personally, I am still trying to figure out the best ways to prepare for when my parents come to visit me in college, but it is always so comforting to see them. Overall, your parents care for you and miss you, and if your parents are anything like mine, their nagging is their way of showing you that.