There is a stark difference between studying for midterms and frantically preparing for finals. Midterms cover a small portion of the class and, with finals, chances are that you are forced to bury your nose in your notebook and memorize every single line of frantically scribbled notes. It’s torturous and more than a little bit unreasonable. It causes anxiety levels that could easily be prevented – with all due respect, life in the real world is not based off of how much of the chapter ten biology chapter can recite or how well you can retain random artifacts of information. It does not work that way in the real world, but I suppose school is not the real world. Hence, we must cooperate if we want to get our degrees, move on and attain optimal success levels. While studying for finals, there is a lot that goes into the mental process and I have determined that a particular sequence is in play.
1.) The Acceptance
This is the stage where you accept your fate, drag your tired limbs to Starbucks, order a venti peppermint mocha and brace yourself for hours of staring at a blank laptop screen trying to photosynthesize words into your memory. You know that you have finals to take and have told yourself that you can handle it. Chances are, during this stage you are taking a bunch of snapchats with your friends with captions such as “finals with these lovely ladies”, “we have this on lock”, or “exams, come at me”. Oh, honey… This stage is bliss, but bliss is temporary and in the back of your mind, you know what’s coming.
Enter stage two:
2.) The Annoyance
Okay, you’ve officially been at the library for three hours at this point and it has taken every ounce of your motivation and willpower to complete your study guide and ensure an A in the horizon. But you’re bothered, rightfully so. Studying for finals is irritating. School interferes with life, amirite? More than likely, you start complaining at full volume to whoever will listen that you just want to sleep, eat, travel to exotic destinations or even drop out of college. You second-guess your decision to put yourself through the emotional turmoil of a four-year roller coaster and have images in your head of quitting everything at that moment and hopping on a red eye to California, New York or anywhere that will get you as far away from the demons of finals as possible.
3.) The Physical Pain
After sitting in the same chair for hours in a row, you feel a spasm of pain in your legs and bottom and start to squirm in your seat. Chances are, you most likely have a headache as well. You probably also forgot your Tylenol in your apartment and the headache is strong enough to cloud your vision, as well as your motivation for studying. You debate returning home but you know that is a terrible idea. Just ask your planner: it will specifically tell you exactly how many pages you have to read for English Lit, how many random papers you have to complete by the next day at five PM and a quiz due at midnight. Essentially, you are swamped. So you stay in your seat and keep working.
4.) The Exhaustion
Perhaps the worst stage of finals week, the exhaustion phase indicates that the motivation you had during the acceptance stage has officially been lost. You are so tired that you want to curl up and ugly cry from the combination of stress and fatigue. No judgment. This is the stage where you really start to be concerned about how much you have to get done. You regret the “treat yo’ self” Netflix and half baked ice cream session you had when you could have written all of your papers and memorized all of the organic chemistry equations. You know that when you’ve reached this dark pit there is only one solution. Onto stage five.
5.) Coffee
It is officially at least 11:00 PM and it is that time of night where you know your brain will betray you if it is not refueled with caffeine. Unfortunately for college students, caffeine IV’s have not yet been invented. However, the next best option is the Starbucks line. You know that your traditional mocha or latté will not have the kick you need to beast through your workload, so you order your coffee black, rub your eyes one last time, and get ready to stuDIE.
6.) The Productivity
Now that you have your second round of coffee, you have transformed from a nervous, tired wreck into the superwoman of studying. Now a creator, you are marking items off of your checklist and taking immense pride in every single check mark. You are not quite finished with your tasks but are making enviable progress. Pretty soon you will be done, right? Not so fast, speedy Gonzales.
7.) The Crash
Eyelids start to droop, your body endures a series of jitters and the caffeine wears off not slowly, but all at once and you are left feeling as if you have fallen into an ominous pit of hopelessness. All the progress you made after your second coffee session has ceased and now it takes every ounce of your motivation to so much as type two words. Luckily, you are almost done for the night.
8.) The Last Second Wrap-Up
Though not your best work, you muster up every ounce of ambition and motivation you have left for the last hour. It is the longest hour of your life, no exaggeration, and consists of multiple eye rolls, low-key cursing the world and mumbling out loud about how much you want to sleep. It’s justified. Just keep working diligently and all will be swell.
9.) The Relief/Completion of the Task
Congratulations! You have reached the final stage of finals craziness! You are now free to go home and rejoice in the warm embrace of your bed… That is, until tomorrow: repeat and reload.