As a kid, one of my pastimes was worrying about things. Constantly.
As a kid, one of my pastimes was worrying about things. Constantly. I’d often get lost in a labyrinth of hypothetical situations, stressing to plan for these highly unlikely events that I was so convinced would occur. Reflecting on these silly childhood phobias really puts things into perspective and serves as a nice reminder that often, worrying doesn’t matter much in the long run.
So join me as we dive into the vast range of worries that haunted little Anna’s head. Some of these may be relatable, others…might just be unique to my crazy worrier brain.
1. Volcanoes
For most kids, natural disasters are pretty terrifying. I apparently didn’t understand the idea of “inactive” volcanoes, so I thought any volcano on Earth could erupt out of the blue. This fear was on the lower side of this list since I felt pretty far removed from any potential volcano eruptions in the suburbs of South Jersey. However, anytime a kid in my class would talk about their upcoming trip to Hawaii, I worried for them. I ended up visiting Hawaii in 2018 and can confirm I did not fall into any volcanoes.
2. The Red, Yellow, Green Behavior Cards
I believe this was a pretty common behavior management practice across elementary schools. In 3rd grade, my teacher had this large bulletin board where each student had an envelope containing three cards: Green, Yellow, and Red. Everybody started each day on the green card which meant your behavior was good. If you started acting up, the teacher would put up your yellow card as a warning, and the dreaded red came out if you were really bad that day. The worst part? Everyone in the class could see which card you were on! Being in any color other than green was pretty much the most embarrassing thing that could happen to you in class.
3. Giant Squids in the Swimming Pool
One summer, my brother and I were packing up to go to our neighborhood swim club. While my parents were still getting ready, they didn’t realize they had left a TERRIFYING nature documentary about giant squids on the TV. The rest of that afternoon at the pool, I was extra cautious, making sure there weren’t any tentacles trying to grab my ankles and drag me into the deep end.
4. The Bermuda Triangle
While on the topic of the sea…
I remember one day, my mom told me she once took a cruise to the island of Bermuda when she was a kid. The look of complete horror that I gave her, thinking my mom was somehow invincible and was able to survive traveling through the Bermuda Triangle. Maybe I should’ve spent less time worrying, and more time paying more attention in Geography class.
5. Katie Kazoo, Switcheroo!
I think reading the book series Katie Kazoo-Switcheroo was responsible for this one… Whenever I was watching a performance: a musical, concert, dance, etc… I always had the random thought: “Hey, what would happen if I randomly swapped bodies with one of these people while they’re performing?” It sounds ridiculous to even write this down, but it’s the truth! In these delusions, I’d be stuck in the spotlight, frantically trying to keep up with the choreography, hitting those high notes, or nailing the dance moves. I’d wonder how I’d manage to pull off the impromptu performance.
6. The Banjo Ghost
In third grade, my cousins were in town, which meant a week-long of sleepovers, adventures and…ghost stories? I guess my older cousin was in a big ghost phase, and she got me convinced that we could hear a haunting strum of a banjo echoing from my neighbor’s house. I already thought those neighbors were mean and creepy, so this sounded reasonable. For every night that week, every creak, rustle and gust of wind heightened our fears. The only way we could fall asleep was when my aunt stayed in my room, watching over us until we were out.
7. Escaping Quicksand
Maybe I watched a few too many movies as a kid, but I was absolutely convinced that one day, I’d find myself in a life-or-death quicksand situation. How would I escape? Does struggling make it worse? These were the questions I needed to plan for.
8. Escalators
My grandma told me that one of my cousins lost his shoe while going up an escalator once. For some reason, I thought that meant his shoe got sucked into the top of the escalator, and he never got it back. I thought this could happen to a person too, so I’d always jump once I got to the end of a ride. Looking back now, she probably meant his shoe just fell off and rolled down the steps.
9. Fire Drill AND Lock down at the same time??!!
In grade school, my classmates and I tended to stretch our imaginations with crazy hypothetical scenarios. My teacher even invented the term, “The What if monsters.” to describe our habit of pondering the most outlandish “what if” situations. I distinctly remember once getting into a heated debate about what would happen if our school had a lock down and a fire drill at the same time. Other kids kept throwing in even more “what ifs”: “What if there was a tornado drill, too?” and “What if a wild kangaroo breaks out of the zoo and runs loose in the hallways?!” That day reminded me that every kid had these crazy imaginations as well.
To a certain extent, worrying is a normal response when you are unsure about things. In the short term, it can offer a sense of readiness and even a semblance of control over the unpredictable. However, it’s important to put your doubts in perspective. Ask yourself: In a few years, will you still be giving these thoughts as much time and effort as you are now? Probably not. Often, the worries that seem so all-encompassing today tend to fade into insignificance when viewed through the lens of time.