Aesthetic or Authentic?
‘Aesthetic’ is one of my generation’s favorite words. When talking with friends, walking down the street, or scrolling through social media, it is not uncommon to hear this buzzword thrown around:
“Her feed is so aesthetic.”
“My style aesthetic is usually pretty granola.”
“I love her aesthetic!”
“Look how aesthetic this picture is.”
The word aesthetic is meant to describe something one finds beautiful or visually appealing, but in recent years it has taken on a new meaning that helps categorize a certain image. From liking and saving images we find aesthetically pleasing or ‘aesthetic’ on social media to claiming we fit into a certain aesthetic for the way we dress, the concept of aesthetics can help us define who we are and what we like in a simplified way. However, it can be easy to get too wrapped up in seeking out and curating just the right image.
It may be easy to place 100% of the blame for young people’s infatuation with aesthetics on social media; however, I think we can dig deeper into the roots of the stereotypical images we associate ourselves with. Growing up, I remember one of my first dilemmas was choosing between being a ‘girly girl’ dressed in all pink and playing with dolls or being a ‘tomboy’ dressed in jeans and playing with my older brother. In my mind, I had to pick between these two images. Moreover, I had to fulfill these roles completely. If I chose to be a ‘girly girl’ I could not imagine being caught with a toy car in my hand or my role as a ‘girly girl’ would be disqualified. This was the first, and certainly not the last, time that I mistook an aesthetic for my own identity.
I know I am not alone in this need to fit into the mold of an aesthetic. Most recently, the ‘that girl’ aesthetic took over social media. ‘That girl’ embodies the image of health, self-love, and overall well-being. When one pictures ‘that girl’ they may envision someone in a matching workout set doing yoga, drinking a smoothie, and journaling afterward. This image, this aesthetic, is one that countless girls drew inspiration from. Everyone seemingly wanted to be ‘that girl’ and they would stop at nothing to recreate that lifestyle. It may seem harmless to incorporate such things as a green smoothie or morning run into our lives. These are healthy habits, right? However, when our incorporation of these things is not rooted in our own wellbeing, but rather in achieving an image, we do more harm than good. As we dive deeper and deeper into associating with an aesthetic, it may feel harder to escape it. Suddenly we can’t eat our favorite meal because ‘that girl’ wouldn’t. Suddenly we miss out on late night social plans because ‘that girl’ would go to bed early. Suddenly we are miserable in this ‘picture perfect’ life because it is not authentic to who we are. We can not be ‘that girl’ and our true selves at the same time. An aesthetic is not a rulebook for living, and we will drive ourselves crazy trying to adapt to a mold.
It’s also important to consider the authenticity of these aesthetics that inspire us. Social media, where so many of these aesthetics originate, is a highlight reel. No one’s life looks as picture-perfect as it may seem, but this can be easy to forget. Comparing how our life looks to that of a heavily curated, filtered version of someone else’s is not healthy. Life’s value should not be based on how it looks, but on how it feels.
I have spent countless years switching between and trying to conform to different ideas of who I think I should be. One of the most freeing things I have done for myself is doing away with living for an aesthetic. I have multiple styles and interests and opinions. I draw inspiration from countless different lifestyles and people. What I find beautiful and the way I live my life is limitless; I do not feel the need to pick and choose to fit in anymore. I am so much more than a simplified snapshot of what a beautiful life looks like. Life does not need to be “aesthetic” to be beautiful. My life is beautiful to me because it is mine, and yours can be too.