Gary Chapman’s 5 love languages aren’t the only ways to love
Love languages have been a topic of conversation since Gary Chapman published his book, “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate” in 1992. According to Chapman, the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, giving/receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. I encourage you to read about them to understand which resonates most with you.
Lots of love goes unnoticed. I think love in itself is quite an abstract concept, and the more I think about it the harder it is to understand. It feels strange to put love into little categories of how it can be given and received; love is too big and too nuanced to be defined by whether it’s said out loud, written in a letter, baked into a cake, etc.
There are countless articles to read and quizzes to take to best understand your language of love, and it’s a great idea to spend some time reflecting on some of the ways you tend to give love as well as some of the things that make you feel loved. But just because Gary Chapman’s claim to fame is the five love languages, it doesn’t mean there aren’t other ways to convey your love.
For me, one of the most underrated and important ways to love someone is through food. Sharing a meal provides an instant means of connecting with the people around you, and it also gives you the opportunity to simultaneously incorporate all five of the officially recognized love languages.
Food is one of the best ways to take care of someone. When your loved one is sick, you bring them food. When your loved one is sad, you ask if they’ve eaten yet. When someone is in the hospital, you bring food to their family. It’s a subtle and welcomed way of letting people know that they’re important to you; that you care about their health and want to help however you can.
Food is also completely universal. Everyone needs to eat, so sharing a meal is one of the easiest ways to spend time together. It presents the perfect opportunity to tune into the people around you and to just be together and appreciate their company.
Take the quiz here to learn which of the five love languages suits you best!