After the highly publicized Supreme Court confirmation of alleged rapist Brett Kavanaugh, there were outcries from people of all views. One recurring statement was that events such as these are signs of it being a ~dangerous time for men~. As a woman who lives with the societal dangers posed to us every day, I have to say that statement doesn’t seem quite right.
Men have a somewhat misguided fear at being falsely accused, but really they have no reason to be worried about allegations of assault if they haven’t crossed the line with their partners. No woman will go through the intense scrutiny that coming forward with these allegations brings unless they are true and add valuable information to a conversation. We need to stop the narrative that women who come forward have some ulterior motive besides simply telling the truth. False rape accusations only account for less than five percent of all accusations, and that doesn’t even take into account the many rapes and assaults that are never reported at all.
Moreover, whatever “fear” men think they face now is nothing compared to the fear women live with Every. Single. Day. Even in the last few months there have been countless stories of women being violently attacked doing everyday things. If you’re a woman, you literally have to adjust the way you live your life in order to minimize your chances of being assaulted, and even that isn’t enough sometimes.
There are plenty of situations women are forced to handle differently than a man would. Want to go on a jog as a woman? Better have your pepper spray ready and your keys laced through your fingers! This is just one example of something most men can do without even thinking. A while back, I was walking home from a friend’s place at about 10 o’clock on a Thursday night. I was alone, so I was on high alert and, like mentioned above, had my pepper spray ready to go. On my way back to my apartment, I passed a man walking on the street with Beats noise canceling headphones on. In that moment, it really struck me the differences in the way men and women live their lives just to be safe. I would never in a million years feel comfortable walking at night with headphones on, let alone ones that cancel out the surrounding noise. Yet here this guy was, walking nonchalantly through the streets presumably listening to his favorite playlist.
If you need more examples of this, just look to the party scene here on a college campus. Guys can feel free to go out on their own, whereas girls would never dream of going without at least a few friends. After all, girls need someone to watch their back wherever they go. A girl at a party can’t leave her drink unattended for even a minute, but I’m willing to bet that thought never crosses a guy’s mind. Pretty much everything a girl does when she goes out has some safety component to it. Guys on the other hand, are free to enjoy a carefree night if they wish.
Now, don’t get me wrong, this isn’t meant to be an article attacking men. I just want to remind everyone of the real issue here. The issue is not one of false allegations, it’s not one of a fearful time for men. The issue here is the way women are forced to adjust their lifestyles in order to give themselves a basic sense of safety. Let’s remember that going forward- let’s believe women when they come forward and help to educate the men in our lives to be allies.