Classic Dad Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Roll Your Eyes

Dad jokes are a special kind of humor, with equal parts dorky and punny, that make us cringe, roll our eyes, and sometimes even laugh. Here are a few classic dad one-liners to get you through until you see your old man again. 

“Why can’t you hear when a pterodactyl goes to the bathroom? Because the p is silent.”

“What did the fish say when it ran into the wall? Dam.”

-Dan, 53“No, I got them all cut.”

-Keith, 54, when asked if he got a haircut“What’s black and blue and sings? Bruise Springsteen.”

“What’s green and sings? Elvis Parsley.”

-Dave, 52

“There are two things you should know about drinking. One, it causes memory loss, and two, it causes memory loss.”

-Chris, 51“Do you know why you can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.”

-Mark, 46

Are you missing your dad yet? There’s nothing quite like the corniness and predictability of a dad joke. Next time your dad says he’s hungry, beat him to the punch with “Hi Hungry, I’m Dad.”