It’s not quite what you think it’s going to be
Her Campus has helped me process a lot over the past few years. Entering into my last semester as a part of this organization, I fully expect this to continue two-fold. I’ve seen a lot of different odes to Her Campus, and while I was always grateful, I didn’t think I would be writing one myself. I’ve also seen a lot of “21 things I learned before turning 21,” sage advice that I always appreciated, but also never thought I would write myself. However, as Ed Sheeran so viscerally sings, “Life is tides changin’.” Before the tides in my life completely change yet again, I find myself a variation of both of these articles, giving myself a chance to process how drastically my life has changed over a short period.
Reading over my articles from the last five semesters, I watch myself go from the nervous girl starting to find herself, to someone who knows herself from head to toe, to a woman who might still be a little more lost than she is found. But, through it all, Her Campus has given me a safe place to be who I am while learning about myself. Over the past six months, I’ve needed this more than I’ve let on. My articles from this most recent semester address a lot of different things, ranging from my reflections on my time abroad to contemplation about the end of college. Underpinning each article, but going unaddressed, is that the past nine months have also been the hardest I’ve ever faced. While that challenge is not letting up anytime soon, I’m blessed to have the Her Campus community in my back pocket as I go through it.
I know many of you are major Swifties, so I don’t think I need to tell you the lyrics of “It was supposed to be fun, turning 21.” Don’t get me wrong, I love Taylor myself, but what I don’t love is how much I romanticized turning 21. No, simply turning 21 does not make you into an adult, that comes with experiences and tribulations. Although I did consider my life “changed” on my 21st birthday, it was probably not in the way that most of my peers had. Instead of staring down the lines on State Street, I was staring down a chronic diagnosis. Instead of basking in the sun, I was basking in uncertainty about what my life would be like next. And of course, instead of spending the weekend with my closest friends, I was spending the weekend in the hospital. I’ve never believed that there would be a single, best day of my life, but I was looking forward to my birthday as a small win in a series of what felt like never-ending losses in 2023. It was a lot to process and it was not something I let a lot of people into.
I have been struggling with chronic symptoms for months. It’s affected my physical, spiritual, mental, emotional and social health (did I get all the categories?). I barely, and I truly mean barely, get through the days. I am on the up and up, and if there is one good thing that came out of my hospital stay, it is that I have all of the medical attention I need and that it isn’t going away. While physically I am getting there, mentally, it is a lot slower of an adjustment. That is where Her Campus comes into play. When I wrote the first draft of this article, it was full of a lot of blood, sweat and tears as I processed what had just happened. While the article didn’t have a direction (hence, why I am re-writing it), it did give me a direction after a few months of feeling as though I didn’t have one. It let me process and feel in control again, sharing as much or as little as I wanted to. I think that at the end of the day, this is the real beauty of this platform. Her Campus was started as and continues to be a place for college-aged women to feel, breathe and most importantly, develop a community and love for writing. Neither my time at UW nor my life in general would look the same without Her Campus week after week and semester after semester. It’s shown me how to build up other women, how to use my voice and how to tell stories that others can relate to. It was there for me, even if school wasn’t formally in session.
While the initial draft of this article will probably never be published, it was cathartic for me in a way that nothing until then had been. As this last semester picks up, I didn’t want to forget to thank Her Campus for being a part of the ride. Hopefully, it can be a community for you too in some way.
HCXO,
Madi