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8 Things We Can’t Wait to Dislike on Facebook

Facebook just announced it’s finally adding a dislike button! While Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerburg, reports the button is meant to share empathy over serious worldly issues, here are some things that we wouldn’t be disliking out of empathy.

1. Bros being bros

We really don’t need to see another gym selfie, no matter how ripped you are. I also doubt that you became THAT much more ripped from the last time you posted a gym selfie, which was well, yesterday. Bragging about going to the gym is really tacky too… good for your mental health, but not for our mental health as we numbly scroll through your mundane Facebook posts.

    

2. Game Announcements

We’re all really happy you FINALLY reached that level in Candy Crush, but we don’t’ really need to know the nitty gritty of how you spend your free time. Also, I’m not really interested in helping you gain another life or donating some crops. Games on Facebook just need to go.

3. The Overly Cute Couple

 Everyone has that one couple that they Facebook friends with that’s just over the top mushy gushy. In fact, they’re so mushy that you’re secretly waiting for the event of the century—the break up. How powerful would we feel if we could finally dislike their very many makeout photos?!?

4. Paragraph long Birthday Wishes

Look, we’re happy that your friend gets to celebrate another year of life, but we’re not too keen on the paragraph stating how she’s “nothing but the best!!” and “best friends for life!!” when you’ll probably post the same generic thing the next time your ‘best friend’ has a birthday.

5. The “Ugh…life is so against me; I miss you Babe <333”

Really…really?! There is nothing more annoying than begging someone to come back when clearly ‘babe’ isn’t buying it either. Call them, text them, show up at their doorstep, anything but posting a sob story on Facebook. 

6.“Humble Braggers”

 I’m happy that you accomplished something, but do you think the rest of us really care? We don’t, and we know you don’t want to admit that you are bragging, but boasting your accomplishments on social media is pretty much showing off your huge piece of humble pie. There’s nothing exciting about reading a bragging post, it’s just annoying. We’re all begging—please take your life somewhere other than Facebook!

7. The Complainer

Unless you have a very viable reason for expressing your complaints on Facebook, none of us really care to read just exactly what you have to complain about. Negative people are all around us. Stop acting like the world owes you everything and everything that happens to you is oh so terrible.

8. Summer Photos in the Winter

PLEASE keep posting constant reminders that we’re all freezing our butts off while you’re enjoying the sun or relaxing on a beach. It actually doesn’t even make us jealous; it just makes us mad that you’re having a much better winter than us.         

While we may feel a little mean disliking any of these posts and may lack the courage to press the dislike button, it’s nice to know there’s options. Here’s hoping people will finally get the hint!

Hi, I'm Abby Coppens, a junior at the University of Wisconsin- Madison. I'm pursuing a degree in Economics and Retail. In my free time, I really enjoying hanging out with my friends and family, doing homework, biking, and reading. I'm the biggest friends fanatic on the planet. Go Badgers!
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