This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Wisconsin chapter.
Many of us Badger collegiettes know what it’s like to push ourselves to the limit. Most of the time this quality helps us when we need to study harder for a midterm or run that extra mile… But when it comes to a night out sometimes we need to know when to throw in the towel and just stop.
Here’s a handy list to help you recognize when it’s time to call it a night:
- Your text messages look something like this “WHETEr u”
- You look around to find not a single person you know
- You’ve thrown up one too many times
- You’ve peed on the side of the road
- You’re obnoxiously tweeting in gibberish
- You think your sending hot Snapchats
- Your recent texts are all ex-boyfriends
- You are drenched in beer, sweat, and occasionally urine
- You’ve fallen from elevated surfaces and feel absolutely nothing when you hit the ground
- You’ve found yourself walking into too many inanimate objects
- You are dancing alone to no music
- The sun is rising
- You are about to go to sleep in something that looks nothing like your bed
- Your last twelve phone calls are to any restaurant that will deliver
- There is pizza cheese in your hair
- You have now lost five “frackets”
- Shoes are not even in the question anymore
- Running in heels has never been so easy
- -2 degrees feels like 110 degrees
- Everything is spinning
- Your hair is dangling in a toilet bowl
- Shots are going down like water
- You’ve lost track of how many times you’ve given out your number
- You’ve acquired 3 new phone numbers all in the format of “Name, Frat”
- You think the Kelvin filter makes your Instagram look good
- Your eyes are closed in every picture
- All of your pictures are either a blurry nothing or awkward videos that were meant to be pictures
- You’ve misplaced every item (wallet, phone, bag) that was with you when the night began
- The pregame feels like it was years ago
- You are now crying because someone took a bite of your leftover Chinese food
- The chances you are alive tomorrow morning are slim to none
- Jonah Hill suddenly looks like Leonardo DiCaprio
- You are walking home and people are waking up for their morning jog
- Not a single f*** is given about anything
- Your clothes are just not on anymore
- A trip to the hospital is necessary
- Your tab is still open at the bar you left three hours ago
- Bruises are just whatever at this point
- You’ve consumed an equal amount of calories in late night eating as all the alcohol you just drank
- All eyes are on you in the middle of the bar
- A vegetarian finds themselves scarfing down a cheeseburger
- You feel everything in your stomach coming back up
- It’s your last priority to answer your roommates worried texts
- You find your roommate has relocated their bed to the bathroom floor
- You realize the shirt you are wearing is not the one you came in (or its on backwards… or just not even on at all)
- Your sticky boobs are no longer sticky
- You’ve asked every single person in the room to come to the bathroom with you
- You are confused about your location
- Your Snapchat story is now 500 seconds of pure nothing
- You simply just can’t.