I am a person who loves love. I like to see and read about it in tv shows, movies, books, and even real life. I have always dreamt of having a boyfriend in high school, like in the films, but when the opportunities were in front of me, I said no! Every. Time. To be completely honest, I don’t see myself being in a relationship anytime soon. I have too much life to live first.
Before I came to college, I grew up naive about some parts of the real world. I didn’t get my first job until I was 18, and that was only for spending money, not to pay bills. Now that I am in college and starting to build my life, I don’t want to add the elements of a relationship to my already busy life. Also, I want to learn about the world on my own before including anyone in it. Some people move out from their parents to move in with their partners, which isn’t bad, it’s just not for me. I know that I have depended on the adults around me for most of my life, but now that it is my turn to apply it to my life, I want to have a go at it alone first.
With dating these days, it seems as if people want all the good things that come with being in a relationship without being in one. For example, friends with benefits and these benefits include emotional support, sex, and romance, all things that should be taken more seriously than they are. From the experiences of my friends, family, and my own, people want to “talk” which is just another word for building a relationship without the title. I get people talking to get to know each other, but once it starts to feel like this is all it’s going to be, questions need to be asked. It seems as if I would only be there when it’s convenient for them, and for me, that just won’t do. Without that title, people feel they can talk to and be with while also keeping the person they are literally building a RELATIONSHIP with around. It’s crazy that people will “talk” for months and create a deep connection with someone, yet go and create that same thing with someone else. God forbid the other person goes and does the same, now it’s a problem because “you know what we are” or “you’re mine.”Everyone is single until y’all come to an agreement, otherwise, don’t be relationship material to your friends because that’s all they are, a FRIEND. Honestly, I give folks about 3-4 weeks until I ask, “what are we doing?” Because I’m not going to sit and waste time when they could be blocking me from my husband. Oh no, ma’am.
I have big dreams for my future, and I want to be able to chase them wherever they may lead me, it might sound selfish, but I don’t want to worry about anyone holding me back from pursuing them. I have plans to “save the world” when I get out of school, and the world isn’t just South Carolina or even the United States. So, with all that being said, ladies and gents, put yourself first, we have the rest of our lives to find love. We are in our 20s, and we change so much during these years that what we want now, we may not want in the future, but if you want to chase your dreams while finding love, do what makes you happy.