This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Winthrop chapter.
“So trust me when I say if a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a s***, he genuinely doesn’t give a s***. No exceptions.”
Can anyone guess where this infamous line is from? No, it’s not advice from your bestie, certainly not your parents, or your daily sob sessions with “Being Mary-Jane or Grey’s Anatomy“. It’s from the 2009 film “He’s Just Not That Into You” based off of the New York Time’s best seller by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo.
I’ve always been obsessed with the film as I’m sure many of us are, hello Scarlett Johansson and a HUGE hello (inserts heart eyed emoji) Bradley Cooper, but after getting my hands on the book, I fell in love all over again.
The book was release in 2004 with the film following it up 5 years after. So for us 90’s babies, I can assure you during that time I was sobbing over the last Lizze McGuire episode airing on February 14, 2004 ( talk about a horrible Valentine’s day) than pulling my hair out over whether or not Jeremy was handing me a “Do you like me? Check Yes or No” handwritten note.
Fast forward to 2009…
2009 opended up a new year for many of us “High School Freshman Year”! So when this film came out I was TOTALLY feeling it… probably still not understanding, but hey I’m a teenager, I can relate right? The most relevant this movie has been is definitely in college and into our young adult lives. The list of why he’s ignoring you or friend-zoning you could probably go on for days, but I’ll keep it short and simple with 23 ways to get over, understand, and simply take the hint that he’s just not that into you.
Disclaimer: All of these answers came from men between the ages of 18-25! Sorry, ladies “he teases you because he likes you” is not the answer! (My second grade teacher clearly knows that was a load of hoopla!)
1. If he seems aggravated, unexcited to see you, not willing to take a picture, or be seen in public with you; he’s not that into you because you come around way too much…
2. If he has a lot on his plate, he won’t talk about it, but it doesn’t take away the fact that if you keep hassling him about, it he won’t want to be around you.
3. If you act unintelligent to get more attention.
4. If he short talks/text you.
5. If he doesn’t go out of his way to contact you or makes excuses as to why he can’t hang out with you.
6. If you use vulgar language.
7. If he want’s you to be confident and independent, but you don’t have humility, it is a deal breaker.
8. If he lacks communication with you.
9. If he blows you off when you initiate texts, phone calls, or to hangout.
10. When you don’t make an effort, he thinks he shouldn’t be the only one reaching out.
11. If you’re not on time for things, punctuality is a major factor!
12. If you come off as desperate.
13. If you’re inconsistent, too moody, or a liar.
14. If you’re just not what he’s looking for at the moment.
15. If you’re overly dependent on him for your happiness and security.
16. If you have unrealistic expectations.
17. If you’re insecure.
18. If you bring your past and negative energy into the process of getting to know one another.
19. If your views contradict his.
20. If he feels that adding a girl into the mix would limit his career and life options, because he would have to modify his life goals to make you fit into the equation.
22. If you give attention to too many guys.
23. And lastly what our good friend Alex bluntly tells us…
“trust me when I say if a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a s***, he genuinely doesn’t give a s***. No exceptions.”
As women, this list isn’t intended to be used as a list of Do’s and Dont’s, but instead a way to stray away from those who are blatantly giving you signs that he’s not interested… it’s a way to stay away from the jerks who don’t deserve you and instead lead you in the direction of that one (inserts Michael Ealy, Channing Tatum, and William Levy) who does!
As Christina Aguilera beautifully belts out for us, “You are beautiful in every single way!”