The cutest thing a boy could do in elementary school was say he liked a girl during recess; in middle school, it was hugging a girl before class and holding her hand in between periods; and in high school, it was taking her out on dates and (hopefully) buying her a promise ring.
It’s no secret that our eyes are immediately drawn to adorned fingers when people gesture with their hands while talking. It’s also no secret that I was incredibly jealous of every girl I met who had a promise ring from her significant other, which, surprisingly, was more than just a few.
I’ve been a single lady for a while now, so it was confusing to a handful of my friends and family members when I decided to purchase a promise ring for myself over the recent Christmas break. Because my words failed me at the time of their inquiry, here’s an explanation on why I bought myself a promise ring and what it means to me.
I purchased my promise ring from Pandora at the Mall of America, and I knew the second I saw it that it was the one for me. I also knew the second I put it on that I’d name her Luna, after the sparkle she has like the moon.
A superficial reason I was set on buying it for myself was because of the simple fact that no boy from my life had ever gotten it for me. I’d wanted that ring since I was a sophomore in high school and with there being no promise of it showing up as a gift from either of my previous relationships, I simply didn’t want to wait any longer.
However, a more meaningful reason I purchased the promise ring was because I wanted a piece of jewelry to remind me of the promise I made to myself at the beginning of this new year. Looking back, I noticed that I became a different person in my most recent former relationship. I became a person who I always said I’d never be; who I always said I never wanted to be.
I became someone who ignored red flags and gut instincts; someone who was battered on the inside from not having the right mind to let go; someone who thought she could fix the damage in him but couldn’t acknowledge all the damage he was doing to her.
I accepted a love that was less than I deserved.
I bought Luna because she represents my ultimate promise to stick to my morals that I’ve otherwise wavered from in the past to make toxic relationships work.
With her on either of my hands, she’ll be there to keep me company when I feel lonely and to symbolize the beauty in remaining true to myself—and that’s something no boy can ever take away from me.