This world we live in right now loves the idea of a binary, whether it comes to gender, political parties and even the need to define personalities into two main categories: introvert or extrovert. We’re absorbed with the certainty that comes with being starkly on one side or the other.
But what happens for those who are in the middle?
I’m not the biggest fan of the word ambivert, which, as defined by Merriam-Webster, is a person who exhibits characteristics of both introvert and extrovert. It’s kind of like being an omnivore; you eat plants and animals, so there’s a healthy balance. Couldn’t the same thing be said about humans needing traits of introverts and extroverts to thrive?
When I say the word introvert, the first things that come to mind are shy, reserved, quiet and thoughtful.
When I think about extroverts, I think outgoing, talkative and energetic.
The week of March 16-22 is National Introverts Week, so for this article, I want to embrace the idea that I can be both introverted and extroverted and that they’re not mutually exclusive by writing open letters to people who may feel the same. I hope by reading these letters, we’re able to embrace and unite the different sides of us that make us whole instead of continuing to choose sides.
To the Introverts,
Maybe you’re reading this on a day when you want to recede into the deepest corners of your comforter and participate in social hibernation. And if that’s the case, that’s perfectly normal. In fact, it’s healthy to find time in your life to just be… not to be entertaining, be hardworking, be engaged, but to sit and just be.
I also want to address the parts of you that some people don’t think are positive. There may be times when your shyness seems to get in the way of engaging with people. You want to curl in on yourself because taking up space is frowned upon. But this means when you do speak, there’s thoughtful intention behind it.
In your most reserved moments, you’re probably soaking up everything around you and becoming an observer. That’s something we need more of in the world. A lot of people listen so they can talk; you listen so you can respond.
There are also times when your introvertedness may keep you from being your most involved self with parts of your life you love, like friends and family. It’s not the greatest feeling to simultaneously require a recharge and feel like you’re depleting a connection. But I can promise the people in your life who love you will appreciate that you know what’s best for you and will welcome your return with arms outstretched wider than they ever knew possible.
In your moments when you’re taking time for yourself, you’ll become more appreciative of the ways you are. And the way you are is exactly what you need to be at this moment. Worry about the next moment when it comes.
Sincerely,
A Sometimes Introvert
To the Extroverts,
You woke up this morning with the energy to change the world or at the very least, change the way you see the world. That view, maybe clichely, is through rose-tinted glasses. Your personality can best be classified as bubbly. You aim to be the best version of yourself and see the best in others. You’re a go-getter.
You walk into rooms and they’re instantly brighter because you just give off a pleasantly contagious attitude. We need more people who are willing to be handed things by life and are able to pour it in a half-full glass. Also, you’re oftentimes one of the brightest lights in the darkness.
Your talkative nature fills the silences and allows for creativity and innovation to bubble forth. But being the voice for everyone can leave you wondering what your own voice sounds like. When should you speak up and when should you slow down?
But I know this can be exhausting as well, always charging people up while your energy is depleted. You need to have the favor returned for you. In these moments, reflect on what makes you feel energetic and what makes you feel devoid of energy.
Trying to sparse out how much of each leaves you feeling balanced because you may be bubbly, but you don’t want to run the risk of always fizzling out.
Sincerely,
A Sometimes Extrovert
I hope in reading these, you saw some overlap, especially between the themes of being someone else’s energy and taking time to recharge. Much like my omnivore comparison I made earlier, life, in my opinion, is made a little better with pieces of introversion and extroversion.