Your first year of university is full of many ups and downs, and the first hill to climb over for me was adjusting to living with a roommate. I lived in Clara Conrad Hall during my first year at Laurier. If you are familiar with residences here in Waterloo, you may know that there are definitely more glamorous lifestyles to adjust to. No A.C., community washrooms and a bed that is made for a small child. But hey, for me, the environment itself was the least of my worries. I come from a small town about seven and a half hours north of here, so you can imagine that when I arrived, I made it my mission to meet as many people as I could and try to live my big city dreams like I’ve always imagined.
Walking up my three flights of stairs on the first day to my humble abode in D2, girls knocking from door to door to meet each other, parents crying in the halls as they left. I awkwardly made small talk with my roommate in my room. The classic; “Where are you from? And what’s your program?” conversation carried us through for the first hour or so. Days go by months even of just not talking, perhaps a “good morning!” if we were feeling crazy that day. However, I was lucky enough to meet my best friends and current roommates in that same D2 wing and constantly complained to them and wondered if I was the issue. We concluded that we were just polar opposites, and there’s really nothing you can do about that!
Now, little old small town me coming to a party school, you can imagine how two and two would go together. Let’s just say I was definitely the ‘going out’ roommate. Perhaps coming home a little too late on a school night after dollar beers at Pub at times, so I can imagine where she thought I was a little out there.
Although we did not share the same interests and might have had some disagreements with how clean our room should’ve been, I can say now, looking back, that you’re never going to regret being kind and mindful of your roommate’s needs that might differ from yours. Boundaries are important. There is no shame in asking to turn the lights off a little earlier one night or to suggest tidying the room together when it gets out of hand. Sometimes, you just need to get out of there. I basically lived in my friend’s room down the hall for all hours of the day until I went to bed. It was not ideal, but they always reminded me not to be afraid to stand my ground. You deserve to be comfortable in your own space as much as they do.
Girl friendships are complicated. You are not being difficult or unkind for respecting yourself and your needs. Ultimately, I think it’s safe to say that you don’t have to be ‘best friends’ with every girl you meet. You will find your people. One last piece of advice to take with you is if your friends tell you to sleep in their room for your nineteenth birthday, listen… thank me later!
Peace & love,
Gracee