What they say: “No gifts this year. I know I said that last year, but this time I really mean it.”
What we think: I mean, that’s great for me. I can spend more money on Starbucks coffee then complain about being broke. Did they really mean it though? I know they said they meant what they said, but did they mean to say it? They know that I know they’ll bring a gift, which means I know that they know I have to bring a gift. Okay, if they bring a gift I can just smile and say, “I would have gotten you something but the greatest gift of all is the time we spend together.” Or something cheesy like that. No, what am I thinking? They’ll probably be mad if I don’t get anything. I have to buy a gift.
Gift season is every season, and it’s exhausting. Few can afford it and yet somehow everyone expects it. As students, our budgets can be tight and it’s not always easy to justify these purchases. But the unspoken laws of friendship and dating dictate we must, so every year we spend more than we can afford. Luckily for us, there’s a simple way to survive gift culture on a budget.
The key is to pay attention to detail. Gifts are meant to be a symbol of love and gratitude, and what better way to show you appreciate someone than by remembering the little things? Do they drop their phone a lot? Get them an upgraded phone case. Do they love to read? Get them a pretty bookmark. Do they hate pasta? Get them a new brain (kidding). This attention to what someone loves and needs is often more gratifying than any pricey gift. You’re sending them a message. You’re saying, “I know you think nobody else cares, but I do.” Try to avoid generic gift cards when possible, because it implies that you’re giving them a present out of courtesy and not because you connect with them on a personal level.
The thoughtful approach works every time, but what if you don’t know the person you’re buying the gift for? You may have a mutual friend, or perhaps you work at the same company or maybe you hung out once but barely talked to them. The answer is clear: ask someone else. Defer to a friend who knows them better, and chances are your gift-giving experience will be much less stressful. Nobody, least of all someone who barely knows you, cares how extravagant your gift ends up being. But giving them a specific gift makes a good impression and lets them know you are interested in building a relationship with them. When asked, your friend might give you a generic response like “they love fashion.” After rolling your eyes, steer the questions towards more specific answers. Colours? Styles? What kinds of fashion items do they like? If it’s Crocs, cancel your plans immediately.
Gift giving is more difficult than it should be, but by paying more attention and less money, we can find imaginative ways to show our appreciation for the people in our lives.