As the youngest child in my immediate family, I was able to, and continue to, experience the love that my parents have to share with each other. Listening to their destiny-infused love story and where it all began always gives me a sense of warmth in my heart. To me, the notion of love was always such a natural and beautiful thing. Being exposed to individuals who made that clear was a big part of the mental picture I had in my mind. Little did I know what my generation was getting into. I am not the sappy one when it comes to relationships, but it is definitely not questionable when one says that this generation handles relationships in a completely different manner than our parents.
With this being said, to me millennial dating sucks. We’re all trapped in this small box of questions and insecure thoughts with no way of getting out. While our parents were enjoying romantic adventures and focusing solely on themselves, us millennials are constantly worried about why a cute guy hasn’t texted back yet, or why a significant other is liking another girl’s picture on Instagram. I truly believe that the mentality of being in a relationship sounds extremely comforting to most people; however, there always seems to be additional worry when it comes to relationships nowadays.
The personal and intimate aspect today simply goes down the drain. Yes, we all know a bunch of people in strong relationships – but ask your parents about their teenage romances and it’s a completely different process. The social norm in regards to relationships today ends up being completely naturalized where individuals can’t change their ways of being because they don’t know any better. We no longer hear about couples getting married and having children in their early 20s; instead, we find that people are turning away from that as the years go by.
To make things clear, I am in no way suggesting that relationships do not work for millennials, it is simply different – and not in a good way. Take a look at some additional thoughts and concerns in regards to why millennial dating sucks.
“I think the worst is the almost dating stage. You know you guys aren’t just friends but you can’t call him your boyfriend. You’re ‘dating’ but you’re not. What does ‘dating’ even mean these days?”
“The fear of seeming too clingy: the unwritten rules of not texting back right away, for example.”
“I find social media is really annoying when you’re dating.”
“Asking a girl out nowadays seems ‘old school.’ I personally think it’s a great move. So I’m usually confused whether something is a hangout or a date.”
“When I am into a guy, I don’t want him to know for some reason. So instead of being like ‘oh yeah I like you, now what?’ it’s ‘oh well yeah I’m interested in you.’ … Don’t even get me started on trying not to come across as clingy, I’ll wait 2 days before I respond to a guy sometimes. It’s crazy, just crazy.”
“I think the worst part about it is that half the time you end up having these extended texting convos throughout the day so that when you actually hang out with that person, you’re worried about having nothing to say.”
“Millennial dating in university is the worst – especially if the person’s hometown is far from your hometown. That awkward end of the semester/end of year ‘so, are we going to keep this going’ (over long distance) conversation is super stressful and uncomfortable… The heart may say yes absolutely, but your head can lead you to cutting off all ties in order to protect yourself.”
“Relationships tend to not be private anymore because people post it all over social media so everyone knows when a couple has began dating and/or if they break up.”
In the end, university is all about being yourself, having fun and working hard. Relationships that go through all the concerns mentioned above are often tiring and stressful. If you find yourself in a situation like this, it’s always best to work through the struggles. And if you’re in a strong and awesome relationship at the moment, I wish you nothing but the best – love is awesome.