It started when I was twelve or thirteen. I would walk home, 6 houses down from the public bus stop, and someone would yell out their window, or slow down as they drove past me.
At school, the catcalling still happens. It doesn’t matter what I’m wearing or who I’m with. I could be wearing a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants, walking with 3 male friends, and without a doubt, someone will honk and whistle at me. I’ve been followed down the street and ogled, which is terrifying. Men have looked at me as I passed by and licked their lips, which is disgusting.
The worst part is, the people who partake in this behavior think that they are paying women a compliment. Unfortunately, as a human person, and not a piece of meat, catcalling makes me feel awful. It makes me want to go home and scrub my skin until I bleed. It always shocks me just how much these words and actions impact me.
I also wonder what these men seek to achieve by catcalling women- do you think it will make me want to go out with you? You’ll shout “Hey sexy, nice ass” out the window of your Dodge Challenger and all of a sudden I’ll get weak at the knees, give you my number, and suggest we go on a date? What’s going to happen here, bud?
I recently read an article that was called “Why Women Smile at Men Who Sexually Harass Us,” and it scared me, but it didn’t surprise me at all. We smile at men who harass us because we are terrified for our safety. We read the stories about women who are killed because they turn down a man’s advances or reject their drinks at the bar. So we decide that instead of fighting back and standing up for ourselves, it is easier for us to smile, say thank you, and move on.
The problem with this is that it tells the perpetrators that it’s okay. It’s okay to yell vulgarities out of cars at women, to smack their butts as they pass by you, to call them sluts and hoes and lick your lips. Letting them do this, and even thanking them just tells them that not only is their behavior acceptable, it is welcome. Update: it’s not. It’s disgusting, and we probably want to vomit.
If you’re a male, you have a unique privilege in this situation. When you see your friends exhibit this behavior, you can tell them that it’s not cool. It’s weird and gross. And if you’re the one doing the catcalling, first of all, why and second of all, STOP. Grow up, and start treating women like people. The world will be a much better place if you do.