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Hate Me ‘Cause They Ain’t Me: Tips for Dealing with People You Don’t Like

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Western chapter.

There inevitably comes a time when we have to be around and work with people we don’t like. Whether it’s that annoying girl from your group project, that douchey guy on your floor, or your roommate’s siblings; we all have those people that get under our skin and make us crazy.

There are also always going to be people who, for whatever reason, don’t like you. Maybe you gave them the wrong impression, or maybe they don’t even have a reason, whatever the motivation, it can be challenging being around people when you know that they’re not your biggest fan.

Here are some tips for dealing with those people who you can’t stand (who may not like you either).

 

1. Be nice

I know it sounds crazy, but sometimes the best way to deal with a person you don’t like is to be nice to them.  You don’t have to like someone to be kind to them, and treating them politely is a sure-fire way to make sure that there’s no unnecessary drama between you. If you’re nice to them, they won’t have much of a reason to hate you, and, as an added bonus, it’ll probably really piss them off.

2. Don’t Get Personal

This one is a no-brainer. If you don’t like someone, why would you try to get to know them? Avoid sharing unnecessary details with them, and don’t put yourself into situations where you’ll be forced to interact with them socially.

3. Stand Your Ground (But Don’t Get Too Aggressive)

When you find yourself having a difference of opinion with someone that you’re not on the best terms with, it can be tempting to fight back with every fibre of your being. Avoid tactics like yelling, talking down, and being passive aggressive. Try to remain calm, and explain your viewpoint. Be assertive and stand your ground, while keeping your cool at all times. Sometimes people just want to get a rise out of you. Don’t give them the satisfaction.

4. Find Common Ground

If you’re in a situation where you’re forced to be around someone you don’t particularly like, try to find some common topics of conversation to ease the tension. Working on a project together? Talk about your thoughts on the professor and the course. Are they a co-worker? Discuss what’s been going on in your workplace. If you’re really stuck on what to talk about, try talking about the weather or any events or holidays that are coming up.  Finding some common ground will help fill any awkward silences, and help foster positive interactions.

5. Don’t Talk About Them Behind Their Back

It can be tempting to talk about someone behind their back if you don’t like them, or they’ve been saying negative things about you.  I know that it’s satisfying in the moment to let out your negative feelings towards this person, but trust me, it’s not worth it. It’s very easy for your words to get back to them, potentially causing them to talk about you, thus creating a vicious cycle. Vent to your mom or your BFF from high school, who don’t know this person and never will, but hold your tongue and smile sweetly when talking with mutual acquaintances. This is especially important if someone is telling you the horrible things the other person said about you: if they ran to tell you, you can be sure they will run back to report your comments!

 

 

 

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Alex Hawkins

Western '21

Alex is doing a master's degree in library and information science. She graduated with a BA in psychology and criminology in 2019. She previously served as co-Campus Correspondent and President of Her Campus Western. Follow her on insta @alexhawkins65.
This is the contributor account for Her Campus Western.