Today I connected with HC Western Ontario Alumni Brooke Horrobin (who just graduated from Western Ontario, Class of 2015 – Yay Brooke!) for our first ever “AWA” or Afternoons With Alumni! Brooke had been such an active player on the Her Campus team that I couldn’t help but ask her what it’s now like to be ‘out in the real world’. Brooke graciously explained that one of the largest lessons she learnt was that the friends she made in Univeristy are the ones she knows she will have forever. Here’s what Brooke wisely had to say about college friendships.
– Kellie Anderson, HC Western Ontario Campus Coorespondent
“Going to college is one of the biggest transitions in any young adult’s life. They experience so much change within such a short period of time. Whether you’ve decided to be a homebody and stay in your own city or town for school, or jet off to a new place, you still face many life changing decisions on a day-to-day basis. You know what helps us get through these new and usually tough times? Friends. Meeting new people and building relationships is a very key element of college life. Because everyone is going through similar situations and facing the same types of obstacles, it draws us closer with those experiencing the same things. We tend to connect most to people that have the most in common with us. During freshman year, everyone tends to make that extra effort to meet others that share common interests, because in most cases that sets the stage for the remaining 3 years of college”.
- They are the first people you experience adulthood with.
“Typically in during your undergraduate degree (minus some exceptions) student age ranges from 18-22. These are your first 5 years of adulthood. The people you meet during these 5 years will experience many new changes with you, creating memories that you will hold with you for the remainder of life. I often recall my parents bringing up stories from college. Certain moments will just stick with you, because at one point or another they meant something to you. Having these people be a part of these memories ensures that they will likely be remembered as well. Although it is usually not the case to stay friends with every person you make memories with in college, it is likely that there will be at least a few people who have made a mark on you. Going through these new changes and experiences together creates a strong bond”.
- You’ve lived with them…. and survived it.
“Being able to live with new people is one of the biggest challenges you will overcome in young adulthood. Not only do you have to be around others for more time than you might like, but you have to change your lifestyle to fit with theirs. I’m not saying get rid of everything or drop all of your routine habits, but if you like to leave your crap lying around the house, you might want to rethink that when starting to live with other people. Living with someone is the ultimate test of your compatibility with them, especially in relationships. Everyone has those friends that you know you could never live with because your personalities might clash after spending that much time together. Being able to live with certain friends, however, says a lot about your connectedness and ability to compromise with those people, bringing you closer together. Once you master the art of compromise, you and those friends can really conquer anything together”.
- Your bond remains strong, even with distance.
“You know those friends that you don’t see for months at a time, but you aren’t concerned about the friendship because you know that at one point or another, you’ll reunite? This concept is put to the test during periods apart such as summers, or even once you graduate. Some people don’t realize that friendship is not defined by whether you talk to the person every day, spend every waking moment together, or include them in all of your plans. Lives change as people become busy, get into serious relationships, and build their careers. Just because a friend might not ALWAYS have time for you, does not mean they don’t care or do not want to continue being friends. It’s the friends that find time through all of the madness to go out for dinner after not having seen you for 3 months that stay in your life forever”.
- They’ve seen you at your very best and very worst.
“College is a time where emotions run extremely high. It is a transition time, especially in freshman year where you go from being a teen with more supervision and fewer worries, to an independent adult with a great amount of responsibility. These changes can affect your feelings greatly, and things that might not always be the end of the world sure seem like it at the time they’re happening. Young adults can experience extreme mood swings, so the friends that are there to listen to your over-dramatic stories filled with tears that they know you’ll be over in a week’s time, are the one’s who are truly willing to stick around and help you get through any situation. The good times are worthwhile enough for them to be there for the lows, and they know you’ll do the same for them”.
- You can pick up where you left off.
“You are able to go months, even years without seeing the person and are able to act as if you saw them yesterday. Personally, I think this is the biggest factor in a true friendship. Although it can be hard to accept, people drift apart. Someone that you considered your “best friend” in college could be living on another continent than you and you may never see them again. However, the next time they return to your continent and you decide to grab coffee and catch up, you might be pleasantly surprised by how simple it is to fall back into old patterns. You have so much to tell the other person about your new life, and they have tons to tell you too. Life after college changes drastically when people decide how they want to build their futures and where they are going to do so. When you have the ability to reunite with these long-lost friends so casually and without the awkwardness of small talk, you truly know that this friendship was made to last.”
So wise Brooke!Thanks for sharing with us!HC XO