Last month, I attempted to join a sorority on campus. Not because I wanted to be a part of a sisterhood or cared that much about a philosophy… but because my friends were doing it – so naturally, I wanted to do it too. To make a long story short… I didn’t get a bid. I guess the current members were able to read through my façade. Even though this was never my dream, the rejection of not being chosen bothered me a lot more than I thought it would. Being put in a position where I was forced to rethink every moment of that COB event repeatedly was torturous. Did I talk too much? Maybe my skin wasn’t clear enough? Was I too loud? I wasn’t too self-conscious before attempting to join a sorority, but boy was I after!
With puffy eyes and a tear-stained shirt I made my way to the only place that brings me peace: the craft store. Growing up I was a very artistically inclined child (and still am an artistically inclined adult) with a dad who used to make pottery professionally. Throughout my childhood, I would frequently turn to art to escape hardship. It was not only my creative outlet but was like therapy for me. In my childhood home my parents renovated a greenhouse into an “arts and crafts room” where my siblings and I would be able to go in and create whatever we wanted. I browsed up and down the aisles of Joann’s Craft Store until I found something that caught my eye: learn-to-crochet kits. My mom had bought me one for my 17h birthday, but I was never able to figure it out due to not having the time or motivation. Now, I had all the motivation and time in the world.
I returned home with my new kit and didn’t put my crochet hook down until my project was finished. With every stitch, I fell more in love with my new hobby and thought less about the sorority. It almost felt as though I was transported back to my beloved arts and crafts room, a vulnerable child creating something to escape the harsh realities of life. After a long night of single, increase, and decrease stitches, I finished my first crochet project, a little frog named Henrey.
Although Henrey wasn’t perfect, my new little crochet friend made me forget about the sorority and I could feel the confidence flowing through my veins. The rush of adrenaline I got after finally learning a new skill I had once failed at was exactly what I needed to keep me from falling into a deep hole. I ordered more kits and made more friends like Fred the Dinosaur and Gertrude the Llama, eventually I started buying my own yarn and making more things like hats and sweaters. I may not be in a sorority, but I can crochet and that makes me feel just as good as wearing letters would.
I felt as though all the confidence I lost at the COB event I got back when I learned how to crochet. Now, I feel like I can do or make anything I want to, like now as I write this article I’m crocheting a hanging plant for my mom. Situations like these are a reminder of the silver linings. Although feeling rejected sucks, not getting a bid from the sorority was a good thing. I was able to pour my feelings of rejection and self-doubt into a new hobby, and because of that, it and my confidence is flourishing. Let this article serve as a reminder that life is too short to dwell on the little things. If you didn’t get a bid, who cares! Life goes on. Pick up a new hobby, go for a walk, read a book, you will feel better and are better off!