As someone who has struggled with anxiety and depression, comfort is a hard thing for me to find. During quarantine, my mental health tanked because I was alone for most of the day, besides seeing my family. Although this was a grueling time, it forced me to find coping mechanisms instead of fully relying on others. I started to talk to myself. I know that it sounds very strange, but I found peace with my anxiety and depression by talking to myself about my worries. I discovered that true, concrete happiness is being alone and comfortable with myself, which was a feeling that was very new to me. I believe talking to yourself can help people in many different ways such as helping to cope with loneliness, boosting self esteem, and dealing with stress. So, if you are struggling with any of these feelings, I hope that this will convince you to chat with someone you know very well – you!
Personally, loneliness is something that I have always struggled with. I loved being around people all the time and when I was by myself, my anxiety would creep in. Talking to yourself can give you the ability to feel comfort in being alone. I found that when I usually talk to myself, I start with something light that has been on my mind. For example, one time I had an entire conversation out loud about the intricacies of the show Bojack Horseman, just because I wanted to talk about it. After I had finished, I felt content and far less lonely. I was able to have fun by myself and eventually make myself laugh during a low point in my day. Do I feel a little narcissistic making myself laugh because I am just that funny? Yes. Do I really care? No, because I am having fun. The ability to enjoy being alone and to make yourself laugh is a skill I think everyone can benefit from. Talking to yourself can help find happiness and peace in loneliness.
Talking to yourself can also help boost your self esteem. I believe that reminding yourself out loud that you are worthy of love, you are beautiful, and that many people love you makes it resonate more. Sometimes when I am feeling anxious and miserable, I take a moment and remind myself of all the people in my life that care for me. I tell myself that everything is ok and that I am a strong person who can make it through anything. If I can make it through the cringe worthy experience of falling up the steps and grabbing onto someone’s ankle making them look down at me on the floor confused, then I can make it through anything. In all seriousness, it truly does make me feel better to talk to myself and get rid of anxious thoughts floating around my head. It also can help you calm down in a manic state and deal with racing thoughts. When life or even just a situation becomes too overwhelming for you, it is alright to take a moment to yourself and calm yourself down. Remember that people want you to succeed and are looking out for you. Saying things out loud can slow down your thoughts and help you hone in on the good aspects of life.
Lastly, self talk can help you manage stress. Whether it’s an issue with friends or family or a busy schedule, talking it through with yourself can help you navigate through stress. When I have a busy day ahead of me, I usually plan out loud the things I need to get done in the day, which helps me become more organized because I now have a set order to do things. It guides me to prepare for the day and motivates me to get up and put my words into actions. I also like to talk through things with myself, usually in the shower, how to confront an issue with friends or family, so we can resolve it. Preplanning what I am going to say out loud aids me gauge what is the best road to take. When talking to myself about conflicts, it can help to blow off any steam I have about the situation, instead of blowing up when trying to resolve. I could fight with myself for hours about pet peeves I have, like when people pack up before the teacher is done talking and I can’t hear what they are saying and feel bad for the teacher cause they are just doing their job. Talking to myself gives me guidance to get me out my anger and plan accordingly for the day. I can get back in control of my mind without a million things happening, like that one scene in Spongebob where all the little Spongebobs are burning papers and going crazy in his mind.
In conclusion, talking to yourself can help with many inner issues that arise instead of bottling these emotions up. Although, it can be awkward when someone walks in on you sitting on your bed fully immersed in a conversation with yourself, you are not a crazy person. Being comfortable enough with yourself to talk through matters of loneliness, low self esteem, and stress is a strong asset to have. Of course, human connection is important, but it is vital to be connected with yourself.