As a newly-hatched 20 year old, I can confidently say that being a teenager was brutal. There is much to romanticize, but with that came ANGST… And lots of it. There is nothing I love more than feminine rage in music and in media. The more unhinged and messy, the better. Angry girl music was (and still is) the outlet for my pent-up frustrations brought on by my self-image issues, my unhealthy attachment style, and all of my boy problems.
Feminine rage in music is beautiful to me because, regardless of genre, the emotions and themes present are so unbelievably familiar – it’s like I can hear my own ramblings from my notes app in the Fiona Apple songs I listen to. Each unhinged female voice in music sets free generations of pent-up anger, effortlessly verbalizing the pain and yearning I could never put into words. This genre of music defines the insane yet treasured experience of girlhood, which is why I MUST put you on some of my faves:
- “Romantic” by Mannequin P*ssy
“I get along with everyone I meet / I’m so sweet / You’re in a bad mood / Every time you wake up with the bees”
“You would sleep with me / If you could do it comfortably / You’re so sweet”
Have you ever let your guard down, only to have someone immediately make you regret letting your guard down? “Romantic” by Philly’s very own Mannequin P*ssy depicts those same horrors I’m sure you’ve also experienced. You’re kind and outgoing with everyone, yet your companion takes their anger out on you. After a while, it kills your spirit until you literally just can’t anymore and you freak out. GIRLHOOD.
What I love about this song is it begins with a yearning yet admiring tone, as the speaker tries to be understanding with her partner. The speaker is emotional and vulnerable, but we find out about five seconds later when she begins to scream that her partner definitely IS NOT. The emotionally unavailable subject is only interested in the speaker for sex, relentlessly taking their frustrations out on them. Ugh, modern men. Gotta love them.
One-sided connections are one of the very horrors of girlhood I wish on no girl, but I’m sure every girl will probably experience it eventually. Girlhood is forever, so just stay tuned. If you find yourself in that situation or want to fume about things that happened three years ago, turn this song on and go for a jog or something. I can’t say it will heal you, but it will definitely rile you up – that’s what feminine rage music does best.
- “Violet” by Hole
“And the sky was made of amethyst / And all the stars were just like little fish / You should learn when to go / You should learn how to say no”
Sometimes, us as women can experience divides. Internalized misogyny or our own deeply-rooted insecurities often pit us against each other, but there is one thing we all seem to agree on: Pisces men lowkey suck. “Violet” is about The Smashing Pumpkin’s Billy Corgan, Courtney Love’s former boyfriend (and yes, a Pisces). Love provided a very complex and profound summary of her song: “this song is about a jerk. I hexed him and now he’s losing his hair.” Supposedly, Billy Corgan had a girlfriend while dating Courtney Love that Courtney didn’t know about. The other side of the story is that Courtney flashed some random man at a Smashing Pumpkins gig and Billy Corgan saw and dumped her, so I guess we’ll never know what truly happened. The messiness of it all is very teenage drama-esque.
The song itself describes the enraging feeling of never being equal in a relationship, yet still demanding control. The speaker pretends to not be hurt as a means of protection, only to get used again and again. In turn, the speaker ironically ends up using her abusive partner as well (“When I get what I want, I never want it again”) . This reminds me of how we can adopt the traits of those who hurt us, specifically emotional unavailability, creating a cycle of horrors.
If I could put the entirety of Hole’s Live Through This on this list, I absolutely would. The infamous Courney Love embodies female rage through her biting lyrics, raspy voice, and general vulgarity. Whether you like her or not, you cannot deny her that. Give her a listen.
- “Girls Against God” by Florence and the Machine
“And it’s good to be alive / Crying into cereal at midnight / If they ever let me out, I’m gonna really let it out / I listen to music from 2006 and feel kind of sick / But, oh God, you’re gonna get it / You’ll be sorry that you messed with this”
This is one of my favorite feminine rage songs on the planet. As I researched this song prior to writing this article, I discovered something really interesting: Florence Welch wrote this song to express her anger towards the pandemic. She expresses pure rage at a higher power for taking away all of the things that she loves (mainly live music, friends, and performing). Welch herself is agnostic, but she deems herself as “Christ-Haunted”.
We all felt those feelings HARD in 2020, but I carry this song with me day-to-day for a different reason. “Girls Against God” is the perfect anthem for those girls who cope with feelings of isolation by trying to live in a state of nostalgia. We long for when times are better so much that we feel helpless, and we subsequently curse God or the universe for putting us in this situation. If there was a god, why would he create conditions like this? These are the same thoughts that have plagued my adolescence and followed me into my adult years. To Florence, her music and her art is where she derives her spirituality from, far removed from any religion. Music is so deeply personal, real, and tangible that it is a spiritual practice in itself. The unbridled rage Welch embodies with her powerful vocals depicts the helplessness we feel about our place in the universe, yet we feel empowered by the end of the song.
- “Brand New City” by Mitski
“I think my ways are wearing me down / But if I gave up on being pretty, I wouldn’t know how to be alive / I should move to a brand new city and teach myself how to die”
“Brand New City” by Mitski perfectly encapsulates the disillusioning nature of girlhood. The song includes the speaker frequently asking the protagonist, “honey, look at me, tell me what you took, what’d you take?” This reveals a double meaning: the speaker is asking their partner what drugs they have taken, while also asking what they have taken from the speaker. Women often act as the caretakers of men in already unstable relationships, which makes us internalize feelings of rage. Our sense of identity is foggy, which makes us believe there’s nothing better out there for us. We become so obsessed with beauty and appearance to hold onto a semblance of power that it kills our spirit. Mitski captures that perfectly.
- “Sleep to Dream” by Fiona Apple
“I have never been so insulted in all my life / I could swallow the seas to wash down all this pride / First you run like a fool just to be at my side / And now you run like a fool but you just run to hide / And I can’t abide”
This is, by far, the best song that encapsulates the HORRORS we experience in girlhood. Fiona Apple’s “Sleep to Dream” is the song that just screams, “screw this, I’m done”. I wouldn’t expect anything different from Fiona Apple, the woman who quit cocaine after spending a night with Quentin Taratino and Paul Thomas Anderson, saying that “every addict should be locked in a private movie theater with them”.
Her strong sense of wit is visible in “Sleep to Dream”, an empowering anthem where the speaker comes to the realization that they are, in fact, the sane one in the relationship. She discerns the three most powerful tools she owns: her mind, her body, and her voice. Despite male efforts, these tools will never be suppressed. While most feminine rage anthems are (beautifully) unhinged, Apple backs her powerful vocals with lyrics that reveal rationality, wit, and maturity. She can tell the protagonist to go to hell in the classiest way ever, which is why I just love her. “Sleep to Dream” is an underrated banger that you’ll scream-cry to about all of your past situationships. It’s truly hard to put into words how biting it is; listening to it feels like a cathartic release.
Being a teenage girl was tough. I don’t think we get enough credit for smiling through the most complex, disorienting emotions for seven whole years. Many of us look back at our teenage selves and cringe, myself included, but re-listening to the songs I loved then makes me mourn her a little. Girlie went through a lot, and I am eternally indebted to the strong female artists that kept me going.
So, if you give these songs a listen, you will uncover generations of pent-up, pure feminine rage that embodies the sublime experience that is girlhood. Have fun screaming and crying.