You just finished unpacking and your parents have left. The room seems a bit empty. Perhaps you should have brought more throw pillows for that extra bed. Your stomach growls and you decide to figure out where BD is and finally try some of the best college dining food in the country. Maybe you get the half-and-half, or you get something else and are completely disappointed. As you walk outside, you’re greeted by tons of your peers eating together in groups in the sweltering afternoon heat.. You’re a bit overwhelmed and you decide to eat in your room.
That entire first week, you’re busy exploring campus, hopping on orientation zooms, and learning what campus has to offer. You meet lots of new people. You possibly invite some of them to get lunch with you. You click with some people, not so much with others. There are so many names, majors, hometowns, and fun facts that you settle for just remembering their hair, eyes, forehead, and possibly their first name. At the end of each day you’re exhausted from interacting. Maybe being in quarantine made you feel used to being alone for longer?
Your suitemates are having people over and they’re heading out. She invites you to go along. You don’t know them all too well, and don’t want to feel like an outsider. Maybe you notice that one always wears their mask below their nose and you don’t know how to let them know you’re uncomfortable with it. Maybe you procrastinated a little too long and have tons due at midnight. Maybe you’re an early sleeper. Ultimately, you refuse.
You have a few people you’re getting closer with. You invite them to try the sushi at Stanley’s or to do a Target run with you. Although, when you’re walking to grab food, you feel a pang or two of loss as you see groups of people eating together or traveling somewhere. You miss that sense of closeness you had with your friend group back in college. You slow down and wonder if you should go up to them and ask to join. Would that be weird? How awkward would that be?
The reason doesn’t really matter too much. You’re introverted. You’re worried about the pandemic. You decided to go against your advisor’s advice and take 18 credits. Your suitemates and you have different interests. You get tired easily. You don’t party or drink. You just don’t feel like it. At the end of the day, it’s okay. You’re going to meet new people as the year goes on. Maybe you’re not close with your suitemates now, but you’ll definitely know each other by the end of the year. There’s no pressure for you to make friends with certain people or at this very moment. You don’t have to go to every event a group chat or WashU is holding. It’s okay to call your friends back home because you miss them. Call your family, especially your siblings. They miss you. This is all advice more easily given than accepted. How many times have we heard from our WUSA’s and RA’s that you’ll naturally fall into friend groups as the year goes on? Way too often, right? When it comes down to it though, they’ve been through this and they’re absolutely right. If you meet someone you vibe with, invite them to lunch sometime. Move at your own pace as you’re building new friendships, and remember, you’ve already got friends and a support system back home.
