We have all seen the classic Halloween party scene in Mean Girls. Cady Heron walks into a house full of scantily clad girls dressed up (or down, rather) in what one would think of as classic girls’ Halloween party costumes: cats, bunnies, mice, among other animal varieties. I mean, who could forget Karen’s classic line, “I’m a mouse, duh”? Cady, however, is dressed as an elaborate, bloody zombie bride. We laugh and make fun of her, yet there’s something to be said for going against the grain and not conforming to the classic “sexy” Halloween costume. Alas, a list of those costumes to cross off as your potential October 31st disguise.
1. Any animal. Sorry, but wearing black clothing with “ears” of sorts does not qualify as a costume. You can do better than that.
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2. A nurse. Or a cop. Or a stewardess. Or firefighter. Or even a sailor, for that matter. It was cute when you were younger to dress up as your dream occupation, but at this point, you’re not fooling anyone into thinking you’re studying marketing so you can put out fires.
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3. A minion. Minions are so 2013. To be frank, they were already dead before Halloween 2013 even rolled around. However, witnessing someone’s walk of shame while decked out in a bright yellow was endlessly entertaining.
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4. A schoolgirl/nerd. We go to Wash U, where the library at 6:00 P.M. on a Wednesday is far more packed than any Harry’s night. Dressing up as a nerd isn’t putting on a facade; it’s merely dressing to exaggerate a part of who we are, not to mention it’s way overdone.
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5. A “sexy” version of food. Food in its natural form is sexy, and there’s no way to top that. Though the label on your costume might say “Sexy Pizza Costume,” (and yes, that does exist… for $70, nonetheless: http://www.yandy.com/Exclusive-Sexy-Pizza-Costume.php) the sexiest piece of pizza is the one you buy on the streets of New York City for $1. Sexy food costumes are a hard no.
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6. Any character from Frozen. Please, just no. Frozen is over and done with, as evinced by the sheer glory of not having heard “Let It Go” once this school year. You might think you’re being original dressing up as Elsa, but there’s going to be at least six other girls who feel the same way and alas, you are all in the same costume.
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Most importantly, wear a costume that makes you feel good about yourself and that you personally find creative, sexy, or hilarious. Having just written a list of opinionated tips, I might come off as hypocritical, but no one should tell you how and how not to dress for Halloween. The expectations boys place on college women to dress “sexy” for Halloween is ridiculous and dated. Don’t let that prevalent, misguided expectation sway how you choose to dress this year. Go out and buy the ugliest mask you can possibly find, if that’s what makes you happy. See further inspiration below:
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Article cover photo via ibtimes.com